Savage was quiet for a long moment.
“Grim told me eventually,” he said. “Not right away. Years later. Told me what Pops was doing that night, what happened with the girl, what happened when you came back into the room.” He paused. “I didn’t know all of that when it happened.”
“I know you didn’t.”
“If I had known—” He stopped. Started again. “I don’t know if it would have changed anything in the moment because I was just a kid and I was in shock. But I needed to know. You should have found a way to tell me before you just left me.”
“You’re right,” I said. And I meant it. “I should have.”
That seemed to take him off guard slightly. Like he had been braced for me to defend myself and the agreement landed somewhere he wasn’t prepared for.
“I always looked up to you,” he said after a moment. His voice dropped a register. “You know that right. I always wanted to be like you. Not like Grim, not like Pops. Like you. Because you were the only one in that house that seemed like you actually gave a damn about somebody other than yourself.” He shook his head. “When you left it was like—I don’t know. Like the only solid thing in that house just wasn’t there no more.”
Something in my chest moved that I didn’t try to identify.
“I never stopped giving a damn about you,” I said. “Either one of you. That didn’t change when I left.”
“Could’ve fooled me. Nigga I had to kidnap and beat your ass to get your attention!”
“Don’t play with me Savage! I’ll bust yo shit for that!” I leaned forward. “But I’m here now. Sitting across from you right now. I went into a house full of armed people to bring Grim home. I could’ve let Cherish have him. Would’ve solved a problem for me honestly. But I went because he’s my blood and that’s what you do for blood even when blood has made your life harder than it needed to be.”
Savage looked at me for a long time.
“I wasn’t gonna kill you,” he said finally. “In that warehouse. I need you to know that. I talked a lot of shit and I meant most of it but I wasn’t gonna kill you. I couldn’t.” Savage spoke honestly.
“I know,” I said.
“How the fuck you know?”
“I know you Savage. I know the difference between when you’re acting and when you’re all the way serious. You were scared for Grim and you needed somebody to be angry at.” I held his eye. “It was easier to be angry at me than to sit with the fact that your brother had gotten himself into something that even you couldn’t fix.”
He looked away. That one landed close enough that he needed a second.
“I appreciate you,” he said quietly. “For all those times with Pops. All those times you put yourself between us and him. Youdidn’t have to do that. You were the only one who didn’t fear him but that didn’t mean you owed us that. You did it anyway.”
“You were my brothers,” I said. “That was always enough of a reason.”
We sat in the quiet for a minute and it wasn’t uncomfortable. It was the kind of quiet that happened after something real had been said and both people needed a moment to let it settle.
“Clean yourself up,” I said, standing. “There’s clothes in the back room. Fresh everything. Shower, get dressed. We got somewhere to be.”
He looked at me. “Where?”
“Don’t ask me no questions. Go wash your ass and come on.”
—
An hour later I was parked at a location I had coordinated through Marco. Neutral ground. Nothing significant about the spot except that it was private and accessible and nobody would bother us.
Grim was already there when we pulled up. I sent a call to him and told him that I would be meeting him to hand over his brother.
He looked better than he had coming out of that house. The swelling on his jaw had gone down mostly, though it was still visible. He could thank me for that one, every time he caught his reflection.
He was standing outside leaning against a wall, arms crossed, watching us pull up with an expression that didn’t give much away.
Savage got out of my car and looked at his brother and something passed between them that didn’t need words. The specific communication that only existed between people who had grown up in the same fire and survived it together.
I stood between them.
