She trembled with frustration. “You can’t do that,” she said. “You can’t order me not to talk to people.”
“I am your husband.”
“And you told me that when we married you wouldnotseek to control me! You promised me that. If I had behaved in some way that truly shamed you or brought scandal upon you, I would understand your need to change things, but Norman, Ihaven’t. You cannot order me to cease talking with all other men, and I don’t understand why you would want to.”
He turned back to her, striding suddenly close so the distance between them was all but gone.
She gasped. She had to tilt her head up to look into his eyes. It was alarming and captivating in equal measure.
“Don’t you know how I felt, seeing you with him?” he said quietly, his voice very low.
“But you still haven’t told me why. Norman, you’re not a fool. You know that thetonwon’t look badly on what happened at the ball. You know there isn’t going to be a scandal. So why would you?—?”
Her words were cut off, suddenly and unexpectedly, as he leaned in and kissed her.
At first, Susan was simply stunned. She couldn’t manage to resist or pull away. She didn’t know whether she would even be within her rights to do so. He was her husband, and he was free to kiss her if he liked. No matter what she thought about it. Even if she didn’t want it…
And then a shocking warmth flooded her body.
I do want it.
She leaned into the kiss, savoring the scent and the taste of him, the feel of his lips pressing against hers.
His hand came to rest on her hip, fingers digging into her skin. It nearly hurt. But the intensity of the sensation only served to pull her deeper into the kiss.
A yearning filled her as his body pressed against hers.
He does feel something for me.
This was what she had wondered about. She hadn’t known how to frame it in her mind, but all this time, she hadn’t been wondering whether she mattered to him. It was clear that she did. What she had wanted to know was whether he could see her romantically. And this kiss answered that question.
A sudden shock of fear rocked her.
This wasn’t a good thing. Because she wanted him too. And that wasn’t safe for either one of them. To allow someone this close was not a good idea. If she let this connection happen, she could only guess at what might come next.
And I never wanted to fall in love.
She pulled out of his arms. His face was unreadable.
“I should go,” she whispered. “I…”
But she had no idea what it was she wanted to say to him.
She turned and ran up the stairs and down the hall that would lead to her room, and she didn’t stop until the door was firmly closed behind her. She strode over to the bed and collapsed upon it, the weight of the world heavy on her shoulders.
I cannot allow myself to fall in love with him. I know what lies that way, and I want nothing to do with it.
But the taste of him lingered on her lips and continued to torment her, reminding her of that brief, intense moment long into the night.
CHAPTER 27
“Susan, I thought the two of us were going to dance together all night long,” Marina enthused. “I thought I would never leave his arms. I never wanted to. It was one of the most splendid nights of my life.” She sighed dreamily. “But then, I feel that way so often these days. Truly,mostnights feel like the most splendid of my life.”
“I’m glad you’re so happy,” Susan said gently.
The two of them were on a promenade through the park together. When Marina had called at the house, Susan had agreed at once to go with her, elated at the prospect of getting out of Heathmare for a few hours. She had been doing her best to avoid her husband since the kiss the other night, and being at home always filled her with anxiety that she might meet him around every corner. Being away from him was a bit more peaceful, at least.
Marina looked over at her. “You believe that I’m happy, right?” she asked. “I know that you’ve worried, and I know how difficult you find it to believe that love can be a good thing. But please try to trust me, Susan. This marriage has been the very best thing I could have asked for, and I wouldn’t change one thing about it.”
