“Say what you like,” he said, his smile not fading.
“Well, it’s just that I didn’t imagine I would like you as much as I do,” she said. “But getting to know you has been lovely, and I can see that you’re going to be a perfect match for Susan. I can’t imagine anyone better suited to her.”
If only she knew!But Susan knew that she wouldn’t tell her sister the truth. At the very least, Marina would have to be married before Susan would come clean about any of what had happened here. She needed to be sure that the plan had been effective. If she didn’t know that, this might all be for nothing.
So she resumed eating her breakfast, looking up every few minutes to toss coy smiles at the Duke or to catch the ones he was sending in her direction, and she allowed her sister to speculate about her perfect match without saying another word.
By the time breakfast was over, their things had been carried outside and loaded into their carriage. Father, who hadn’t come down until about half an hour ago, was anxious that they should depart at once. “After all, he said, “it looks like it’s going to rain.”
It didn’t look like it was going to rain at all, not in Susan’s estimation. It was true that there were clouds in the sky, but they were wispy and white, not the sort of heavy storm clouds that would have reasonably prompted a comment like her father’s.
“He just wants to go so that we can start talking about the Duke behind his back,” Marina murmured into Susan’s ear.
Susan chuckled. “I’m sure you’re right about that.”
“Well, for once Father and I are of one mind. I can’t wait to get home so that you can tell me all about him! I want to know what it was like to dance with him, and what kinds of things he said to you when the two of you walked alone in the garden…” Marina sighed dreamily. “Isn’t it wonderful to be in love, Susan? I’m so glad it’s happening for both of us at the same time! There’s nobody else I would want to share this experience with!”
Susan cast a look at her.
Marina’s cheeks went pink. “I know, I know,” she said. “I know you’re not ready to saylove.”
But Susan was beginning to realize that her sister was going to keep bringing that word up, that Marina would continue to try to provoke her into confessing that she felt such a thing. That was the real gossip Marina wanted. She wasn’t trying to find out what they’d talked about in the garden. She wanted the innermost secrets of Susan’s heart.
Of course she does. We’re sisters. I want her to tell me that sort of thing about herself as well. I want to know everything about her, and she wants to know everything about me.Her heart ached ever so slightly. Of course, her sister wanted this to be a moment where the two of them could relate to one another more and get to know each other a little better. By rights, it should have been that kind of moment.
But it wasn’t going to be, because none of it was real.
For the first time, Susan felt guilty for misleading Marina, even though she was doing all this for her sister’s benefit. For the first time, she recognized that Marina stood to lose something, and that she might be disappointed when the truth came out.
But she couldn’t allow herself to get caught up in thinking that way. What mattered right now was maintaining the illusion until they were able to get away from the house and on the road toward home.
The Duke stepped forward and bowed to Father. “It was a pleasure to meet you, Lord Crownway,” he said. “And to meet your lovely daughters—Lady Susan especially.” He turned to Susan and bowed to her as well. “Lady Susan, you are charming and lovely, and I know you’ll be a remarkable duchess. I look forward to our next meeting.”
“As do I,” Susan agreed. “And thank you for your hospitality, Your Grace.”
“You two won’t have long to wait to see one another again,” Father said. He wasn’t rubbing his hands together with anticipation, but if Susan hadn’t been looking right at him, she would have guessed by his delighted tone that he was doing that. “The wedding will no doubt happen very soon—as soon as we’re able to make the arrangements.”
Susan wondered how he’d react when the Duke told her he wanted to take his time. They had decided that the information would be better coming from him. After all, if she told him she wanted to wait before marrying, he would take it as just another instance of her trying to prolong the inevitable. When the Duke said it, though, he would recognize that he had to indulge the request or risk losing the arrangement altogether. He wouldn’t want that to happen.
For now, though, neither she nor the Duke mentioned a change in their plans. They simply bid one another farewell.
And for a moment, Susan thought perhaps she saw something unexpected in the Duke’s expression. There was a small smile onhis face, which might have meant anything, but was there also something wistful in his eyes? Was it possible he was going to miss their few short days together as much as she was?
No. Preposterous. I’m just being sentimental, and that’s something His Grace would never do. He’s amused by our situation. That’s all that is.
She turned away from him and made her way toward the carriage. A footman handed her up, and she settled into her seat, looking out the far window at the road instead of back at Heathmare Manor. She would allow herself to think back on the time spent here once she arrived home, and then she would reflect on what it had all meant to her. But what she wasn’t going to do was allow the Duke to catch her looking out the window at him. She couldn’t let him misinterpret the situation and think she was wishing she had been able to marry him after all.
I have to keep my dignity intact. I have to keep my pride. It’s fine that he doesn’t want to marry me, but what he said about me being worthy of marriage anyway—I don’t know why, but I need him to go on thinking that. To believe I am worthy even if he doesn’t want me.
The thought annoyed her. She had never longed for a gentleman’s approval before. Why on earth should she need it now?
And why should she need it fromhim—the most difficult, most maddening man she had ever met in her life?
CHAPTER 7
“We have a guest,” Father announced.
Susan looked up from her embroidery, half relieved and half nervous. She didn’t relish the thought of a guest. Who knew who might have come calling? She much preferred to spend time on her own.
