“All three of us had a lot of fun,” she said. “We caught one fish and named her Princess Delphinium the Third, and we certainly didnoteat her for dinner.”
With all the twins’ attention off of Lilly, the little girl started to relax again, and Evan also felt some of the tension easing out of him. This tea could have been an awkward encounter, but Marina had a gift for smoothing out bumps in the conversation. He felt envious because he certainly could not navigate conversations with such ease.
It is easy to see how she feels invisible. Such grace has a way of going unnoticed in a selfish world, where everyone is vying for attention. Meanwhile, Marina keeps everything seamless without trying to draw attention to herself. In a more just world, she would have had a dozen suitors calling on her the moment she debuted.
“How is married life treating you, Your Grace?” Amelia asked pleasantly.
Evan realized, with a pang of guilt, that he had been silent far too long.Here I am making Marina do all of the hosting.“I daresay it is very agreeable,” he said. He looked at Marina. “I could not have chosen a better wife, even if I courted all of the ladies in London.”
Marina looked startled at the praise. Her cheeks turned pink, and she gave him a small, flustered smile.Why would she be so surprised? She must know that I view our marriage favorably. She must feel the same.
He knew she was comfortable with him because he saw the differences in the way she acted with her family. Even with her sisters, who loved her dearly, Marina kept the attention off herself while taking pains to engage everyone in the conversation and keep everyone happy. But she certainly had no problem speaking her mind with him. He was glad that she felt comfortable enough to express her views. She even tried to provoke him to get a reaction out of him.
Bethany grabbed her sister’s hand. “You must come visit us in London,” she said. “We can go to the theater together and tour the tea shops.”
Marina bit her lip. “Thank you for your offer, but I cannot. Not any time soon, at least.” She sounded regretful.
“Of course you can,” Evan said, frowning. He did not like hearing how sad she sounded. He thought he had already made it clear that he had no intention of imprisoning her in the manor simply because he was a recluse himself. “Perhaps it will do you some good to spend time with your sisters.”
“Yes, as I am doing right now,” she said, a hint of impatience in her voice. “Tell me news of London. Bethany, I am sure you have acquired some fresh gossip since you last wrote to me.”
Of course, she does not want to go out. We have already established that she does not feel comfortable in London society … but she did look truly sad about not seeing her sisters more often. Maybe she isn’t being as honest as I thought she was.
He took a sip of his tea as he struggled to keep up with his spiraling thoughts. Perhaps she was not as comfortable around him as he liked to think. She has already stated that she feels invisible in the marriage. Perhaps she did not speak her mind because she felt safe. Perhaps she was just trying to be seen by him.She speaks with so much heat because I am … cold.
His tea tasted like nothing to him now as a heavy lead settled in his stomach. He set the cup down on the table and watched the ladies talk. Now and then, he would throw in a small remark, but he generally stayed quiet.
He was relieved no one expected him to say much. He was too busy grappling with his shameful revelation to even attempt to keep up with the conversation.
Chapter Twenty-Three
After tea was finished, Evan made his excuses before leaving the drawing room together. “Enjoy your afternoon,” Evan murmured as he left the room. “All of you are welcome to stay for dinner, if you wish to prolong your stay.”
Marina’s brow furrowed as she watched him leave the room. Evan had been even more withdrawn than usual. It was normal for him not speak very much, but he had been tense all throughout the tea. His usually unreadable expression sometimes gave flickers of distress.
He is probably just not used to having guests in the manor. This is probably the most social interaction he has had in a long time.She felt a rush of gratitude for him. Hosting afternoon tea was not something he was comfortable with, but he was willing to endure it for the sake of Lilly and her.
The little girl got tired out from all of the conversation, but it looked like she had enjoyed herself for the most part.Now, I justhave to arrange for her to spend time with children her own age.
The little girl looked up at the twins shyly. “Do you want to meet Prince William?” she asked.
“I always want to meet a prince,” Olivia.
Lilly giggled. “He’s not really a prince. He’s a dog!”
“I beg your pardon, but all dogs are either princes or princesses,” Louiza said, her eyes twinkling. “They are too precious to carry any other title.”
Marina smiled as she watched Lilly and the twins leave the drawing room, with Mrs. Miller following behind. “You can play with him outside,” she called after them. “Just stay in view of the drawing room window, please.”
There was a chorus of affirmative responses from the children, and the nanny nodded in acknowledgment. Marina relaxed slightly.I am getting to be as anxious as Evan when it comes to Lilly’s well-being. I need to remember that I can’t have her in my sight at all times. That would be ridiculous.
Still, the twins could be energetic and a little reckless. Marina did not want them to whisk Lilly away to another part of the property before Mrs. Miller noticed they were gone.
Once she was satisfied that Lilly and the twins were playing fetch right outside the window, she turned to Bethany and Amelia. “Finally, we are alone,” she said.
Amelia leaned forward. “Tell us how things are really going here,” she said. “Now that your husband is not in the room, and you do not have to commit any incriminating details to paper.”
Marina bit her lip. “It’s been interesting. Married life is not like I expected.”
