“Whenever you’re in the room, she’s always watching you with longing on her face. She also loves Gwen. Remember that weekend last year, when you were out of town with the team and we were sick? Who do you think I called to help? Charlotte. She dropped everything she was doing to bringfood and medicine. Why? Because she loves Gwen. Plus she blushes whenever you touch her.”
A strangled, dying cat sound came from Charlotte, and I smiled. “Oh hey, did I tell you I’m in Charlotte’s room right now?”
My mom blinked three times, her mouth parting, before she laughed. “It’s awfully early to be in her room, Hayden.”
“Sure is.”
“I’m hanging up. Tell… tell Charlotte hello for me.” My mom blushed, and it felt a little validating to pull a fast one on her.
“No need. She’s heard this whole conversation.”
“Mm, well, we’ll chat about this later. Bye.”
I hung up and set my phone face down before turning toward Charlotte. Her eyes were the size of saucers as she gripped her coffee cup like a lifeline. I opened my mouth to say something, but nothing came out. I tried again before she burst out laughing.
“I’m so uncomfortable,” she chuckled. “I don’t even know what to do.”
“This had junior high levels of embarrassment.” I joined her laughter and relaxed into the chair. “My palms are actually sweating.”
She snorted and reached for my hand. I opened it, and she trailed a finger over it. “Hayden, what the heck.”
“Told you.” I wiped the moisture on my hoodie before facing her again. “Now that you’ve had some coffee and food, I think we should talk about us.”
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
CHARLOTTE
Hayden liked me. His mom said so. That felt important. Also Hayden had told me he wished he could take back that night three years ago. He kissed me hard and brought me my favorite coffee, without even asking my order. That gesture meant a lot to me.
“So, we kissed last night,” I said, the same squawking sound coming out. “And your mom thinks you like me.”
Hayden’s lips twitched. “I do like you.”
“Cool. Cool. Great.” I stood and wished I wore something sexy or at least better than plaid pajamas. I wasn’t even wearing a bra, and we were about to have quite possibly the most important conversation of my life. No one had prepared me for this situation. “You like me.”
“I always have, Char. I know that’s hard to believe after what I said, but it’s true. My mom also said something that’s pretty relevant. I’d never use being a single parent as a reason not to date, but I want to be someone who can give you what you need. Time, attention, dedication, all of the thingsyou deserve. With a demanding job and a daughter who I’d drop everything for, I’m not at a place to be a good partner in any capacity. I can’t offer weekends away or date nights unless I find a babysitter. I don’t even have someone lined up to help with the season.” Hayden held up his hands and sighed as they dropped in defeat. “You have no idea how much I want this with you, but I don’t know if I’ll be what you need.”
I twisted my fingers together, the sensation grounding me in the moment. A blip of irritation formed in my gut, growing and doubling in size. “Have you thought about asking me what I need?”
He licked his lips, his eyes widening as his hands hung in the air.
“You’re right. What do you need?”
“I don’t need weekends away or date nights or all this attention that takes you away from Gwen.” My throat tightened with emotion. Attempting to be together wouldn’t be easy for Hayden and me. Our lives were so intertwined that everything was complicated. That meant we had to be careful. “I want to spend time with you, and I want you to be honest with me. That’s it.” My voice broke a little at the end, the tension in the room surrounding me.
It wasn’t a bad tension, but it was thick and evident. Whatever we decided in this hotel room would determine our future or lack thereof. “Do you—” I started, unable to finish. I couldn’t put my pride on the line. It had hurt too much last time.
I wouldn’t survive this if I asked to be with him only for him to turn me down yet again. Even if his reasons werevalid. I totally understood them. I played with the end of my shirt, focusing on the landscape through the window. “You have to take the leap, Hayden. Not me.”
He breathed deeply, the sound of his stress causing me to look at him. He frowned and ran a hand over his jaw a few times before nodding. “That’s fair.”
“What do you want then?” I let my hands fall, standing to my full height as his gaze moved from head to toe. This was me. Pajamas and bedhead and no makeup. “What are we going to do? Pretend we didn’t kiss? Continue being friends? It’ll be hard, but if that’s what you want, I’ll find a way to do it.”
“No.” He pinched his nose. “I can’t pretend it didn’t happen. I want this.”
“And what isthis?” I pointed to him and then myself.
“I want to be with you.” His tone shifted to Coach Hayden, where his words were firm and left no room for misunderstanding.
