“Yeah. Gwen wanted to FaceTime.” He flashed a quick smile before putting his excessively large hand on my shoulder and squeezing. “You get us checked in?”
He’s touching me. Hayden is touching my shoulder. Alert the authorities.
“Uh,” I said, unable to form words because the warmth from his palm sent SOS signals to my loins. He had huge hands, and I swore I could feel the callouses through my sweater. First with touching my lower back, now this. It was Too Much. Damn, he had asked me a question. Something important. One I should definitely know the answer to but all I could focus on was his hand on me… and was he moving his thumb?
Hayden grazed his thumb over my collarbone. The little brush of naughtiness had my brain malfunctioning. What were words, even, really? Just combinations of letters that made sense to some people. Weird sounds that were a code?
“Ms. Calhoun?”
“Hi. Yes, that’s me.” I spun around, my face fire-engine red, and I blinked a lot. Like that would restart my brain.
Brendon smiled, and Hayden released his hold on me. Finally. Breathing became easy again, and I adjusted the hair at the base of my neck. “Did you check in Portobello here too?”
“Portobello?” Hayden asked.
“Inside joke,” I quipped, winking at Brendon. The handsome man laughed hard, and I felt kinda cool. “Anyhoodle, tell me he’s on the highest floor.”
“Ah, no. Mr. Porter is in room—” He paused, frowned even. “One oh two.”
“First floor. Great.” Hayden’s clipped tone made me glance at him. Maybe Gwen was sick or something.
“Where are you, Char?”
“One hundred.” I gulped, like having our rooms close together was dirty. Forbidden. Wrong. Did we have attaching doors? Oh my, what if we did? What if I sleepwalked naked into his room for him to turn me down, again? “They aren’t connected, right?”
“No. They aren’t.” Brendon smiled. “Let me know if you need anything, please, and I’ll let the on-site doctor know to expect you.”
“Yes, thank you. You’ve been the best.” I flashed my biggest grin at him before facing the hallway. A sign with an arrow showed rooms 70–150 to the right, along with the pool, and the bar. “How convenient for me.”
“What’s that?” Hayden asked. He hoisted the duffel bag onto his shoulder.
“The pool and the bar are near my room. It was a gift, really. With a little effort, I could never leave this wing of the resort, and wouldn’t that be fantastic?”
He snorted. “Pretty sure Christian has an agenda for us.”
“Don’t let my brother boss you around. Be your own person. Stick it to the man.” Even as I said the words, my stomach tightened with dread at the harsh reminder that it really was a man’s world. I talked a great talk, but could I walk the walk? My athletic director certainly didn’t think so. All the head coaches at our school were men, and they made it known they wanted to keep it that way. My shoulders slumped, and I lost a little bit of my bluster as we made ourway down the hallway. I wasn’t giving in to their bullshit, but the reality of it was something I had to acknowledge.
This place was a perfect holiday hideout where I had no business stressing about my sexist, ageist boss. Greens and reds covered every free inch of wall space. Green lights, red ornaments, and wrapping paper in picture frames greeted us. I inhaled, the delicious scent of pine and cinnamon creating an intoxicating combination.
We passed a mirror, and my breath caught in my throat. We looked like a couple. It wouldn’t be a big deal, but seeing the reflection of us standing next to each other had my heart aching for something that would never happen. We weren’t heading to a shared room where I could peel off his shirt and lick his muscles until he whimpered. We weren’t going to fool around behind Christmas trees or make out in the hot tub. We definitely weren’t about to strip naked and fall onto the bed. I cleared my throat, my face overheating. My breaths came out in shallow gasps, and Hayden touched my shoulder.
“Am I walking too fast? I’m sorry. We can slow down.”
My face flushed even more. The guy of my daydreams thought I was winded from walking. “No, we could walk faster! Yes, let’s do that.”
I wanted space, a moment away from his gorgeous eyes and gentle demeanor. Hayden was so in control on the field and with his daughter. The one time he wasn’t, he kissed me before crushing my soul. Before I did anything stupid, I picked up my pace until we arrived at our doors. “Ah, home. Yes. Mama wants to see.”
Hayden shuffled next to me, but I refused to look at him. Call me a coward, but his nearness made my senses work overtime. That happened when you had secretly loved someone for ten years, told them one night after they kissed you, and then avoided them at all costs because of the humiliation.
When I let my deepest, most secret thoughts come out from the cave in the back of my mind, I always asked myself the same question. If I had the chance to be with Hayden, would I?
The answer was always the same:Hell yes.
Even if I knew it’d end in heartbreak, because despite trying to date other guys, no one came close to the spark I felt with Hayden. Without trying, he ruined me for other men. His kind soul, the way he loved his daughter and parents, the little things he did that made such a difference. He set the bar high, and I refused to lower my expectations. Even if it made me single as a Pringle forever, I was waiting for someone to be better than Hayden.
Sliding the card into the slot, I pushed open my door and was met with a roaring fireplace and the smell of gingerbread cookies. “This is heaven.”
Hayden coughed before brushing past me. He dropped my bag on the floor, and without a glance at me, he marched out. “Let me put my stuff in my room before going to the on-site doctor.”
