My face heated as I sipped the coffee. She’d put creamer in it for me. “You really are the best.”
“I know, now tell me.”
I told her everything. From the conversation, the car ride, the kiss, the things he said during the kiss. The way I threw the past in his face but how he was stubborn as hell. She nodded and withheld all judgement, which was my favorite thing about her. I told her how I was terrified but hopeful, that maybe this new flavor of our relationship could work.
“Wow.” She sipped her coffee, a smirk forming. “Honestly, not that you need this from me, but this kinda makes perfect sense.”
“How so? I’d love to get to that conclusion. I almost feel like this is a dream that is going to end, so I’m still guarding a small part of my heart. It doesn’t make sense to me when I’m not around Callum. When he’s around me, he overtakes my senses and makes me feel important.”
“I’ve had a falling out with a friend before. Don’t get me wrong, friend breakups hurt. You mourn them in silence because we just aren’t as forgiving about it like we are a breakup. But, when we met and became friends, you were grieving. You were devastated. You reminded me ofmewhen my high school boyfriend of three years cheated on me.”
“Where are you going with this?” I gripped the mug tighter, nerves weighing me down. This sounded a little like what Cal hinted at.
She pursed her lips before sighing. “I think you guys were almost dating before but without any physical stuff. You emotionally leaned on each other, were each other’s person, were each other’s everything minus attraction. From whatyou’ve said, you avoided it because you never thought it mattered with him. Did you ever date in high school?”
“Uh, not really.”
“Did you the last three years?”
“A few times, yeah.”
“Because he wasn’t in your life. Because you loved him. You still do, but it’s a different kind of love now.” Esme smiled, looking mighty proud. “I’m such a good best friend.”
I rested my forehead on the counter. “You are, and you might be right about me. Now Callum though?—”
“Same thing, girl. Same thing. He might not realize it yet, but he was in love with you too. He has work to do, which he seems to realize.”
That same fluttery feeling returned but mixed with the sensation of falling. Callum being in love with me was such a curveball, but I didn’t hate it. Not even a little bit. It made me feel special, like I was amazing. Not that I had major self-esteem issues, but I stood a little taller thinking about him loving me. But the second I experienced a little joy, reality crashed back down.
He’d missed a lot of my life the last three years. I’d been working toward a goal of getting a job at the NFL, and our relationship could jeopardize that. The love bubble popped, and within seconds, the warmth turned to ice. How could I navigate these new feelings and him while focusing on my internship? He’d put me second most of college, so why would I put him first right now?
Fuck. The internship!
I stared at Esme, my eyes wide.
“What is it, girl? What?” She jumped up, glancing around the apartment.
“Henry! What about Henry!” I shouted, my voice cracking. How could I be so silly not to think about this until right now?“I can’t get involved with a player! Henry literally said that, and look at me, disobeying. Oh man, I could lose my spot or my chance at getting a job or?—”
She grabbed my hands with a small smile. “First off, breathe.”
I did.
“You said Henry knows y’all are friends, yeah?”
I nodded.
“Okay, then be friends at work. Explore this new thing elsewhere. Easy. It won’t ruin your internship, Ivy. You deserve to see where this goes.”
“I gotta talk to Callum though. Tell him what the plan is so he knows. He wouldn’t want to ruin this for me, that I know.” I finished the cup. “Thank you, for being you and the coffee and listening to me. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
“Likewise.” She took my mug and cleaned it. “But you owe me. I have a date tonight and need help not freaking out.”
“Ah, that explains it. Focusing on me, so you don’t worry. Classic move.”
“Get out.”
Laughing, I grabbed my bag and left for the day, only to find Callum standing outside our apartment with his backpack.
