Chapter Twenty
Tanner
Life had a funny way of making me suffer. I hated distractions and refused to let something keep my mind away from baseball, yet here I was, in the dugout of our third game of the day, anxious as fuck for it to be over. I’dnevercounted down minutes until I could leave the field. Ever.
I could tell myself it was because I was worried my mom would try calling me and something could have happened—despite talking to her two days ago. I could blame my birth father’s tactics, too. But if I was real with myself, it was because I somehow couldn’t let Kenzie know my phone had gotten smashed the night before, after I’d told her I’d call her.
Fucking bad luck.
“Johnson! You’re on deck. Get out there.” Our bench coach spat out a bunch of sunflower seeds, like he always did, and narrowed his beady eyes at me. “Get your head out of your ass and focus. This pitcher is struggling to keep it in the zone. Knock it out of the park, TJ.”
I nodded and grabbed my helmet and bat. It wasn’t that I wasn’t into the game—because I was—it was unsettling how I worried about how Kenzie was feeling. This was new for me. Letting a girl into my tightknit boundaries.No, focus on the game.
Stretching and shaking myself out of the funk, I did my practice routine in the on-deck circle, swinging three times and timing it with the pitcher. Aaron had batted before me and had already struck out twice. The pitcher had been nasty all game, but he was fading.Sixth inning is when to strike.
Aaron hit a soft liner just over the shortstop’s head and the dugout broke out in cheers. We were down two runs, tired from playing all day and just needed a momentum changer. I could fit the role.
I walked up to the batter’s box, eyeing the signal from my coach. He tapped his shoulder, forearm, wrist and shoulder again.Hit and run.That meant I had to make contact with the ball, because Aaron would be stealing second. I hit my helmet twice, assuring him I’d gotten the message, and got into my stance. The pitcher stared me down, but it was a futile attempt. He looked twelve. He did his wind-up, and fired a pitch on the outside corner.My sweet spot.
I cocked my arms and pulled back, twisting my hips and connecting the bat to ball with a loud pop. I knew. I knew it would be out of the park but I hustled to first until I heard the umpire yell, “Homerun!”
Our team hollered when I rounded third and stepped on home. This feeling was the best in the world. The high, the satisfaction of knowing I’d done it.Nothing can replace this.It helped. I didn’t think of Kenzie at all for the rest of the game, or during the celebrations after getting first seed in our bracket.
This was my life. Baseball, celebrations, teammates. I was on my path, the right journey, and it felt perfect. Coach pointed to the scouts in the stands that game and told me two of them had asked for a schedule to see me play again.Me.
I’m making the draft next year, in the round I want.
Hours later, it was just after dinner and I was still without a phone. I couldn’t recall a time I had gone this long without one. Elementary school? Junior high? Before my birth father had conned money out of us, I’d had an old flip phone that I’d used to call my mom for a ride after practice…but it didn’t text. Yeah, that long, over twelve years, I hadn’t gone twenty-four hours without my phone.
Yeah, I had a technology addition, but who didn’t?
The coaches gave us a prep talk for the following day and Zade went into his room early to study the batter’s patterns. Novatown—our opponent the next day—had heavy hitters and few weak spots, but Willows would study and get them. That left Aaron and me chilling in our room and I broached the subject I was desperate to open. “How’s your sister handling the house?”
“Okay so far. She’s at work now but I think Greta’s having her over tonight after their shifts.” He adjusted his position on the couch and switched the TV to a Cubs game. He whistled at a play where their shortstop dove four feet to backhand a grounder then jutted his chin at me. “You were on fire today, TJ. You’re hitting the ball so fucking well. What’s changed?”
“Desperation,” I barked out an awkward laugh and tried to bring the topic back toher. The girl I shouldn’t be thinking about so much. “I uh, am glad to hear Kenzie’s doing well. I know you were concerned.”
He gave me a grim nod and leaned back onto the couch with a loud sigh. He put his arms behind his head and studied me with haunted eyes.Eyes the same shape as his sister’s.“Thank you for being a friend to her. I didn’t realize she needed one, and I sure as hell wouldn’t have picked you to be one, but I’m glad nonetheless.”
I swallowed down my guilty thoughts and shrugged, hoping to look as nonchalant as possible. “I like her. It’s not a hardship.”
He relaxed his jaw at my comment, giving me a quick smile. “This is good for you.”
“What is?”
“Being friends with a chick for once.”
I’m going to hell. Fuck.I needed to think of something, anything to not give it away. One second, two seconds, three seconds went by and I hadn’t answered. Then, by a small miracle, his phone went off and he mumbledGretaunder his breath. He slid his fingers over the screen, no doubt texting her back, and I waited for him to look at me. “Not my first time being friends with a girl. Greta, remember? We never got together.”
He did not like my reference to his girlfriend’s minor crush on me the year before, one that we never talked about but one I loved to bring up. His eyes turned competitive and he muttered, “Fuck off.”
“Just saying the truth. Sorry you can’t handle it.”
“That shit still drives me crazy. Like, I don’t get it,” he scoffed and chucked a hotel pillow at my face. It had the reverse effect he wanted. I caught it, laughed and tossed it back to him. “Okay, so yeah. Not your first time, but it’s still good for your ego.”
“Whatever, man.”Anything to move away from this conversation.“Hey, it’s not too late, I might go get another phone. I don’t like being out of reach if my mom calls. Wanna tag along?”
“I might hang back here and stretch more. My arm has been killing me and it’s pissing me off. Plus, it’s the fifth inning and Cubs are down one run. I wanna finish the game. That cool?”
