I hoped she never lost that joy and wonder.
“Yes, pockets are a must. I keep everything in there when I’m walking around,” I said, laughing and finishing up the organization of projects. With the deadline looming for the grant, Christopher wanted to do it first thing when we got back, and if it meant helping him out, I would be a fool to pass up on that. There was something sexy and charming seeing how he looked out for his sister.
“Noted.” Kayla walked around my classroom and eyed the walls. “Your room is so different than my brother’s. I love your colors. This is, like, the classroom of my Pinterest dreams.”
“Thank you,” I said, grinning when Christopher walked in, and his gaze seemed to go straight into my chest and wrap around my heart in a caress. “I want school to be a safe, fun, and creative place for students. I never got to go to the beach growing up or play ghost in the graveyard or anything like that, but school? My teachers? Their rooms became home away from home, and if kids remember anything about me, or my class, I want it to be that they were safe, loved, and inspired.”
“Wow, I love that,” she said, just as her brother leaned against the door with an unreadable look on his face.
His soft blue gaze lingered on me for a beat before he pushed off the frame and headed toward his sister. “You getting started? We need to leave within an hour to get you to your swimming practice.”
“We’re about to. She was admiring how wonderful my classroom is compared to your boring one. That’s all,” I said, trying to lighten the mood. I’d gone too deep talking about my past and wanted to act like I hadn’t shared a deep part of who I was with the Callahan siblings.
“It’s true,” Kayla said, shrugging and sitting down at one of the chairs and getting her laptop out.
Christopher rolled his eyes and joined her at the table before taking out a notebook and going over her application. It was the absolute cutest thing.
“Is there anything you can tell me about the process on how they select winners?” Kayla asked.
“Mm, I’m not sure, but I think they are looking at the whole student. The person who is applying, not just all the stats. How are you a leader? How do you help others? How are you, Kayla, going to make a difference in the world? Show them who you are, not what you think they want to hear.”
She nodded and chewed on her lip for a second. “Right, yeah.”
Christopher tapped his fingers on the desk. “You were a manager at the church camp for two years—that’s leadership. Then you’re captain of your swim team too.”
Kayla’s face lit up at her brother commenting on her leadership like it was a big deal. It was, and it felt weird listening to them work in my room. I didn’t want to be caught listening like a creep with a major crush, so I got out my own laptop and started a chat with Grace to see if she was done with the letter of recommendation.
Grace: call me
I frowned as worry took root. Maybe she didn’t have time or couldn’t do it. I excused myself to go into the hallway and dialed her number with my stomach in a knot. It rang three times before she answered. “Hey, Grace.”
“Ah, sorry. I’m doing a million things at once and couldn’t chat. I have the letter done. Just need to scan it. Could it wait fifteen minutes? I’m in the middle of dealing with practice.”
“Of course, yes,” I said, hearing the sounds of others shouting in the background. “Thank you. We’re filling out the application now.”
“Are you seeing your brother later?”
Her question sent ice in my veins. Her tone was direct and more than annoyed, and I swallowed, eyeing up and down the hallway a few times to make sure no one was there.Like Samantha.“I, uh, don’t have plans to.”
“Gilly, this isn’t like you,” she said, disappointment clogging her voice and making me feel as small as an ant. “You’re lying to Fritz, and Christopher, and that’s not you. You need to be yourself. Yourrealself. Money doesn’t define you, Gil. Never has. You have too big of a heart, but if what you told me about your weekend with Christopher is true, you owe him the full truth. Not the lies.”
“I know, Grace,” I snapped, pinching the bridge of my nose. “Fritz was camping, then I had that conference, and I have like ten days left of this challenge.”
“I think it’s time to let that go. Money is a huge part of your life. You can’t deny that. You have millions in a bank, and letting Christopher think you don’t is cruel, especially after what he shared with you about his family. It doesn’t have to be a big deal, but it will be the longer you keep this charade up. And don’t get me started on the fact you paid Fritz’s girlfriend to leave. I’m just…not understanding why you’re continuing the keep it from them. Tell Fritz, tell Samantha to piss off, and tell the guy you’re crushing on the truth.”
My eyes stung a bit, and Ihatedthe truth to her words. My best friend was pissed at me, and this was all my fault. Not Samantha’s, Fritz’s, or Christopher’s. Mine. “I-I will. Soon. What if it ruins everything though?”
“I’ve seen you yell at people three times your size in college. You helped me deal with the loss of my mom. You can handle this, Gilly. Fritz will forgive you, and Christopher is into you because ofyou, not your lack of money. Plus, why would you want a relationship with someone who liked a fake version of you? That’s not real. That’s not a genuine relationship.”
“I’ll tell Fritz.”
“I love you, Gil. I really do. But as your best friend, it is my job to tell you when you’re being an ass, and you are. But you have the power to fix it. Money is a part of you. Be honest about it. Stop the dumb challenge. You were only doing that to prove it to Fritz and me, and honestly, I think it’s made you a little crazy. I gotta go. I’ll send the letter in a bit.”
Money is a part of you.
Her words repeated in my mind, and I hated the way it made me feel. I didn’t want my money to define me.
I paced in the hallway, struggling with pulling myself together. The urge to cry hit me hard, but it wasn’t so much in pity as it was frustration. The challenge to live off a teacher’s salary was supposed to be fun and to prove that I could live without all the funds. Something fiery went into my veins. It was like the time Fritz told me I couldn’t juggle, and I spent all summer before seventh grade learning so I could prove him wrong. He didn’t even care when I showed him, but I did. I’d learned it to prove to myself.
