“Nah, you’re just hungover.” I look him over noting the dark eyes and slumped shoulders. He’s looked like that since the team party. The same one his girlfriend, Alexis, seemed to be absent from. “How’s Rosie?”
Something flashes across his face but it’s gone just as fast. Like maybe there’s something there. I recognize the pain and worry reflected in his eyes. I saw it in the mirror too many times when Matty was first born.
“She’s good. My whole heart, man.” He smiles a little sadly. I don’t push. Though I can tell there’s something there. I let out a breath, before deciding to share a bit of my past with him.
“You know, when Matty was born, I was just a kid myself. Scared shitless.” I say, twiddling with the tape on my stick. “Shay, his mom, didn’t want him. Didn’t even care what happened to him. I was lucky to get the call that he existed- was born.”
“Damn.” Jordan shakes his head at his skates.
“Yeah. I drove all night to get there after a game. I took one look at him and decided there was no way I would let him go into the system.” I hold back the tears of the memory I don’t let myself visit often. “I was the only person standing between a very different life for Matty. No matter that I was a kid myself.”
Jordan nods his head.
“Do you ever feel… I don’t know, like you’re not enough for Matty on your own?” Jordan asks, scrubbing a hand across his jaw.
“Every day. I fuck up all the time. Kids are forgiving though.” I shrug. “I’ll work my ass off to be the dad he deserves. Maybe someday, someone will come along who adds to that. I’m not holding my breath.”
Even as I say that my heart knows I'm lying. That someone very specific comes to mind when I think of sharing my life. She’s not ready for that though.
Ronan skates up in his goalie gear, interrupting our conversation.
“You ladies just gonna chat all day or what?”
“We were just talking about that goal Alli scored on him the other day.” Ripley grins mischievously.
“Yea that was brutal.” Ronan sighs, messing with his gear. “Speaking of Alli, she was asking about you.”
My heart skips a beat, but I try to act casual. I shift my weight on my skates, twiddling the tape on my stick—again.
“Uh… Really?” My voice cracks a bit, and I fail to keep the hopeful note from my voice.
“No.” Ronan deadpans.
Jordan’s snort turns to a full out laugh.
“Oh, you fucker.” I throw my glove at the back of his head as he skates off cackling.
As I’m skating the speed laps I earned for that, I see Alli at the edge of the rink speaking with Coach.
Her hand comes up to fiddle with the little butterfly pendant hanging delicately. My chest puffs up with pride seeing something of mine around her neck. I glide for a moment, appreciating the slit in the back of her skirt. When she shifts her weight back on her little fuck me heels, it showcases a bit more of her leg.
I unknowingly skate right into the middle of the drill, my head still turned. Quade, the rookie, barrels right into me, knocking me down onto the ice. My head bounces off the ice. Just once, enough to make me see stars. Not the good kind either.
Thankfully, my helmet stayed intact.
“Fuck, Bridges. What are you doing?” Quade shouts.
“My bad.” I wheeze as he and Fitz pull me to stand.
“I think I know what distracted him.” Fitz nods his head to where I know Alli is behind me.
My cheeks heat.
She probably saw me making an absolute fool of myself.
“Fuck off Fitzgerald.” I grumble as I move past him to continue my laps.
His gloved hand on my shoulder stops me.
