“You really thought I was in that fire, huh?”
“Yes,” she exhaled, closing her eyes and nodding her head, feeling the tears pool again. “And I swear the thought of losing you had me damn near dying on my bedroom floor.”
He kissed his teeth as he stepped even closer to her, bending his legs at the knees to press his forehead to hers.
“You’re not gonna lose me, aight? I’m here, baby, okay? Aight?”
Rylee sniffled as she nodded against him, her hands pressing to either side of his face. To have him here, in her space, promising her something that sounded good but that she knew could change at any time, still was reassuring.
“Your job is dangerous,” she whispered. “And though I knew that already, I didn’t reallyknowwhat it felt like to actually live it until tonight.”
“It’s not dangerous likethat,” he explained to her. “Rarely. Most days it’s ‘help me with my cat’,” he said in a high-pitched voice that brought a smile to Rylee’s lips. “Or ‘my kid locked himself in the basement’kind of calls.”
“Hmph,” Rylee huffed, moving in closer to wrap her arms around him. She wanted to hold him and not let him go, not even for a second.
“I don’t want you worrying too much about that though.”
“I don’t think that’s gonna stop,” she said against him, burying her face in his shirt and inhaling his natural scent. In that moment, she felt so lucky to be able to do that. She knew there was a wife or girlfriend in Brooklyn tonight who wouldn’t be so privileged.
He kissed the top of her head. “Maybe not, but you know… since I’m here now, what you wanna do with me?”
She pinched him and stepped back, and that made him laugh softly.
“Do you see my face right now? Do Ilooklike someone who’s in the mood for any ofthattonight?”
Xander grinned down at her. “If you give me five minutes… I can fix that.”
She scoffed a laugh while shaking her head, smiling now. Relieved again.
Xander pulled her to him and kissed her forehead, leaving his lips there.
“It’s me and you. I’m not going anywhere. Promise.”
Rylee sighed against him, resting her weight on his chest, finally letting herself believe what he was saying. Because it sounded good and she needed to hear good things after experiencing a rush of old memories and the fear of new ones.
“I gotta head back,” he told her. “I’m on call and gotta be at the station tonight. But tomorrow, when I leave, I’ll come straight here, if that’s okay?”
She nodded against him. “It’s more than okay.”
“I love you,” he told her, pressing another kiss to the top of her head.
Rylee smiled and hugged him tight, pressing a kiss to his chest before leaning her head back so he could kiss her lips. And on them she replied, “I love you too.”
Oh, God, she thought to herself as she hugged him just a little tighter than before.
This time, she wasn’t begging God. She was giving thanks.
For the first time, she was so grateful to say that.
And honestly, this moment, this night, was right on time… because it marked the calm before the storm.
ten
RYLEE
Rylee turnedoff her side and onto her back the moment her eyes opened. It was the sanitation truck outside of her brownstone that woke her. That, and the queasiness of her stomach.
She groaned as she pulled herself up into a seated position.
