"Baby, shhh. You need to calm down before you make yourself sick," Nate coos.
I realize we've stopped moving and my knees are helping to support my weight on the couch. The scent of brownies perks me up a little.Did Cass make our special brownies?
Nate chuckles and nudges my chin up so he can see my face. "I'd love to hear about these special brownies, but first you need to take a deep breath."
I'll blame my heated cheeks on all the crying. I don't love when I accidentally mumble my thoughts because they're usually embarrassing.
Embarrassing, like crying all over the man whose heart I broke. Tears well in my eyes as the feeling of being a burden rises.
"I'm sorry." Though I try to wiggle off of his lap, he holds me firm. "I can't believe I did that. Of course you don't want me crying on you. You hate me. But jeez, you aresonice for comforting me."
Word vomit. That will get me in trouble every darn time.
Nate's eyes narrow, and though he might be blurry, I can still see the dominance rising to the surface in his features. "Violet. How many times do I have to tell you Ellis and I donothate you? We miss you so fucking much I literally couldn't relax tonight without coming to find you."
I open my mouth, but he's not done. "And I've already told you, you're forgiven. Apologies are notnecessary. Especially not for hugging me like I've always dreamed of you doing."
"But I soaked your shirt," I whisper, sniffling.
Nate smiles and raises his hands to wipe my tears away with his thumbs. "Is it weird that I don't want to wash it? So I can keep it as a token of your trust."
Those are big words with deep meanings, so I'm not sure how well I'll be able to comprehend them tonight. I file them away to think about after I snack on Cassidy's brownies.
Instead, I huff a small laugh and slump against him once again. "I miss you too."
Nate sucks in a breath and hugs me so hard I feel my bones creak. "Fuck baby. Thank you. I'm so sorry for how we treated you at first. There was so much heartbreak clouding our judgment."
"I know. It's okay." I mean my words. I'd probably react the same way if our roles were reversed.
Nate stiffens slightly. If I weren't as close to him as I could get, I might not have noticed it. But soon he relaxes and begins to rock us slightly.
"Violet?" he murmurs after a while of me snoozing on his lap. My brain feels calm in his embrace, and that's way more than I can hope for.
"Hmm?" I snuggle deeper, knowing this is about to come to an end.
"You need to get some sleep. But may I take you out for breakfast in the morning? Please. There will be coffee, bacon, and hash browns."
"Cheesy hash browns?" I tease.
"Anything you want."
I smile into his chest. "Then yes. Is it a date?"
"How 'bout we decide that in the morning once you've gotten some rest?"
So thoughtful. As I see Nate out with a whispered goodbye and a lingering glance over his shoulder as he walks down the hall, I decide I really need to call my mom.
Thirty-Six
BLUE
Icould scream. Not only because I'm pissed at three men, but because I feel fucking useless. Literally, the scream is building in my throat.
All I want is to hold my kid and tell her everything will be okay. Saying it over the phone isn't the same. Hearing her cry and tell me how confused she is, broke my heart. I know how she feels even though my situation was very different from hers.
She broke two people's hearts. I had mine broken by four men because they disappeared. Ghosted me. Whatever.
Now they're back, and my sweet Violet is trying to keep her feelings buried to give everyone what she thinks they need. I haven't even met this Jamie guy, but I know for a fact he is irrevocably attached to her.
