Dad squeezes Mom’s hand, leans over and kisses her forehead.Chiara and Lidia, both let out an identical, “Ooooh.”
“We’ve all forgotten how to just have fun,” Dad says.“But it’s what Antonio would’ve wanted for us.I’m sure of it.”
A tense silence, filled with tears that have already fallen and those yet to fall, descends on us at the mention of my murdered brother’s name.It’s Mom who breaks it first.
“You’re right, he wouldn’t,” she says.“So how about it?Stay.”
For the first time since my brother died, I get the feeling she might be getting better at dealing with her grief.For a long time, she was inconsolable and until right now, she was always sad, but she sounds almost happy now.
Dad nods.“Yes, I’ll stay.So, what do we do?How about a nice game of Monopoly?”
He beams at me and my sisters.Our games of Monopoly are never nice.We’re all far too competitive for that.But Lidia already flew inside to get the game, so it’s decided.
He calls in Raffaelle and tells him that he’s not going back to the city tonight.
I’m happy that Dad is staying the night, I am.But with all the extra guards he brought with him, I might not be able to sneak away tonight.And Matteo might not be able to sneak in.
We’ve been out here for a while.The afternoon was golden, the ocean stretching out before us seemingly made of pure molten gold.I almost told everyone about Matteo then.But now the sky is dark red and black with patches of pure white here and there.The color of blood, bandages, and death, Dad said.Then laughed it off when Mom told him to stop being so morbid.
That’s exactly what would’ve happened if I told them about Matteo—the beautiful golden landscape would have turned into blood and death.It might also happen if I try to see him tonight.
The game of monopoly we’re playing starts out slow and boring, but soon the first mini arguments start.Mom is trying to keep the peace, as always, but Lidia is already showing her more competitive side, which is usually well hidden in her, and Dad and Chiara are making no secret of the fact that they’re in it to win it.They’ve both said that exact thing several times already.The sky is mostly just black now.
As for me, my head’s not in the game.I never much cared about winning or losing.There was never any point.As my father’s eldest daughter, I always understood my life would in large part be decided for me and I would have to do as I’m told, go where I’m told to go, and have no life outside the family.But I care about winning Matteo.And I dread losing him more than I’ve ever dreaded anything else in my whole life.
And just as I think it, I see his reflection in one of the wide-open doors leading onto the terrace.For a moment, I’m sure I’m seeing his ghost, and my heart starts banging so hard in my chest, I actually gasp for air.
Do they know?
Is he dead already?
Has my dad already had him killed?
But then he moves, and I see it is him in the flesh.I actually sigh in relief, I can’t help it.I cover it up with a cough and try to look at anything but him.A feat much harder than it should be.
“What’s wrong with you?”Chiara asks and both mom and dad are looking at me with concern.
I cough again, shake my head and smile.“Nothing.Absolutely nothing.”
And that’s the truth.Everything in my life is just perfect right now.Because he came.Because I’ll see him tonight.We won’t even have to leave the house.And because I’m finally living the life of my dreams.
Chapter48
MATTEO
The momentI heard old man Codelli was visiting the beach house on Sunday, I rushed straight to Ferro’s house to tell him.But he already knew.He’d never told me who his deep informant with the Codelli family is, but it’s gotta be someone very close to the old man if word of the guy’s movements are reaching him so fast.
He told me to go to my post guarding Goldie’s empty apartment as if nothing is different and that I’d know when the time for attack came.I didn’t appreciate not being told the plan right then and there.
Then word came that we’re all needed at the Hamptons house because the whole family will be spending the night there.I went too.And tried not to picture the attack at the beach turning into a complete massacre, the sand where I took Goldie’s virginity turned to red mud from all the spilt blood.Mostly I tried not to picture holding Goldie’s dead body in my arms.Wasn’t easy.
This time, I didn’t stop by Ferro’s house.I couldn’t anyway because we drove there in the family’s town cars.I suppose I could’ve texted him, but I didn’t.Because a different plan’s been hatching in my mind all day…
The five of them—Codelli, his wife and their three daughters—are playing Monopoly on the terrace as I arrive.It looks like the game is quite heated, like Monopoly always is.
As soon as Goldie saw me, her big eyes locked on mine and I was sure everyone saw the happiness and devotion in them.I thought my hours were numbered right then and there and all the carefully laid plans would be for nothing.But luckily old man Codelli was too engrossed in an argument with Chiara over some obscure Monopoly rule to pay any attention to me or anyone else.
Rafaelle is standing next to me, looking out over the bay, his face suggesting he’s imagining himself out there.Swimming maybe or riding in the lit-up yacht moored nearby.
