I scrolled through and found a photo I’d taken of Nicholas playing in the sandbox. He was smiling and looking straight into the camera. Feeling almost giddy, I handed her the phone.
She covered her mouth. “Oh my God.”
“I know.”
“He looks so much like you at that age.”
I grinned. “He does.”
“I’d ask how it’s possible that Taylor hasn’t noticed, but I don’t think he’s ever seen your baby photos. At least, I’ve never showed him any.”
“Not sure even the resemblance would lead him to the right conclusion. Taylor has no reason to believe I was at the resort the same week Blair was. He and I hadn’t fully reconnected back then, so I hadn’t told him about my impromptu trip.”
“And, of course, he doesn’t know you as Tate.” She shook her head. “I didn’t even know that nickname until you told me about it.” She tilted her head. “What’s wrong with Teddy, anyway?”
“Nothing’s wrong with Teddy. I just never liked Theodore. You know that. And one of my buddies started calling me Tate when I was in the service.” I shrugged. “It stuck.”
“Oh my.” She placed her hand on her heart as she looked down at the photo of Nicholas. “My heart hurts for Taylor.” Mom frowned. “I’m sorry. The reality of this is just coming in waves.”
“I know.” I sighed. “Believe me, I know.”
She took my hand. “My heart hurts for you, too.”
“Because of Taylor?”
“Not just that. You have yourself convinced that the mother of your son is better off without you. But I can see in your eyes that you still have feelings for this girl.”
“You can?”
She nodded. “You’re my son, Teddy. I know you. I remember when you were younger, the way your ears would turn red when you were excited about something. The same thing happens when you talk about Blair.”
If anyone could see through me, it was my mother. Gulping, I said, “It doesn’t matter how I feel about her anymore.”
“Of course it matters,” she countered.
I hung my head. “Taylor’s been trying to set her up with one of his friends.”
“Well, you need to stop that.”
“I encouraged it, actually.” I gritted my teeth, pissed at myself.
“Why?”
“Because no matter how much I want her, I can’t have her if it means hurting my son. She should also be with someone her own age. Don’t you think?” I shook my head and laughed. “Herparentsare my age.”
Mom gave me a look. “I think it’s a little too late to be worrying about that. She should be with the person shewantsto be with, regardless of age or anything else. There’s something to be said for making things work with the father of your child.”
“That would make sense under most other circumstances. But Blair needs to experience more before settling down. I want to help take care of Nicholas so she can get some of her life back. And neither one of us wants to hurt Taylor.”
My mother sighed. “I know things are still raw between you and him, but Taylor is a grown man who’s married. This is going to shock him, yes. It’s going to hurt him, too. And it may destroy the progress you and he have made. But hewillget over it someday, and when he does, you’ll be happy you didn’t let her get away.”
She was really fucking with my emotions right now, pointing out things I had tried to deny and bury. Was it worth uncovering them?
“I wish I could believe that, Mom. I really do. But how many years now has Taylor held my past mistakes against me? I don’t think he’ll be too excited about having more to forgive. Have youmetmy son?”
“I have, and I understand why you might think that. But you have another son to think about now, too.”
“Nicholas will always have me in his life. That’s a given.”
