Just the idea of hugging Zoe, kissing her had my chest blooming, like my heart was growing to make room for one more person. With a handful of words, Zoe had turned me from someone who didn’t date into someone who fantasised about what it would be like if this dating wasn’t so fake. If only she wasn’t planning to leave Hartwood Bay.
So what do I do when my stone, cold heart starts to soften? I became even more grumpy than I usually was.
By the time Mariah’s netball training popped up in my weekly calendar, I’d already been accosted by my brother, mother, father and future sister-in-law. Zoe and I had arranged a fake date for Friday so when I ran into Ryan who’s daughter played in Mariah’s team, I’d just about had enough questions about Zoe.
“Damo,” he sat next to me and we exchanged pleasantries, both focused on our daughters. After we’d watched on in companionable silence for a few minutes, I felt tension rising and could feel his attention on me.
“So, Zoe?” he raised his eyebrows.
“What about her?” My words were terse.
“Why didn’t you tell us about her at the last dinner?” He probed, lacking any subtlety. As a police officer, I hoped that he interrogated suspects better than he was questioning me.
“We were trying to keep things quiet because of Mariah.” The well practised lie slipped off my tongue easier than it had been, although it tasted worse each time I uttered it.
Ryan nodded slowly, briefly looked over at our girls before focusing back on me. “I call bullshit.”
“What?” I didn’t have to fake the shock I felt at hearing Ryan’s response.
“I think it’s bullshit, I think if you were really seeing Zoe, that you wouldn’t keep it a secret or at least not for long.” The cocky bastard raised an eyebrow at me.
“What makes you say that? You’ve known me what? A few months?” I was grasping at straws and uncertain if I even wanted to keep the lies going.
“Enough time for me to know that if you were seriously dating someone, you wouldn’t lead them on for months before telling your family.” Ryan gave me a pointed look. “I know your brother fairly well, family is important to you both. I also know you well enough to say that you don’t make half hearted decisions. Once you’re in, you’re all in.”
I didn’t want to admit it, but he was right. I might not take many risks but when I do, I’ve considered every aspect before fully committing to them each time. No testing waters for me, I assess everything then jump in. I sat in silence for a minute before throwing my head back and sighing. “It’s fake.”
Ryan looked like the cat who got the cream and if I wasn’t so relieved to tell someone that I was lying my ass off to my family, I’d be annoyed.
“Zoe saw how much Mum and Donna were hassling me about the bachelor auction, so she told them she was my girlfriend,” I confessed.
“Sounds like an ideal way to get out of volunteering, so why are you still so grumpy?” His question appeared genuine but Icould tell he was still probing but I was done with trying to hide anything.
“Because of all the women who could pretend to be my girlfriend, she’s the only one who, if I had the choice, that I would actually date.” I felt hollow with those words, it was just my luck that when I found a woman I was interested in that she was already one foot out the door.
“So what’s stopping you?” Ryan asked, matter-of-factly.
“She’s only here for a few more months and you’re right, I don’t go into anything half hearted.” I could pretend I held back for Mariah’s sake, but I didn’t want to open my heart again. Or open it for the first time really.
“How do you know that she’s leaving?” Ryan’s leading question directing him to the heart of the problem.
“Bella told me that she moved here to cover Paige’s maternity leave.”
“So?” he turned his head toward me again. “Doesn’t mean she wants to leave. You should ask her.”
I was mentally kicking myself, I let the fear of being left again make my decision for me. Libby was happy with Sara, my brother was happy with Bella, why did I deny myself the chance to be happy too?
Chapter seven
Zoe
The scene was familiar. My colleagues Bella, Audrey and Quinn sat in my little granny flat. It seemed only a few months ago that we all sat in Quinn’s bedroom as she got ready for her first date with her boyfriend Wade. I was about to go to dinner with Damien and pretend to be his girlfriend. I had to sit opposite him in a restaurant and put up with people thinking that I shouldn’t be with such a good looking man. Again.
It was bad enough I had to endure it with Christian in Melbourne but Hartwood Bay was my escape, and I didn’t want to have to put up with it again. But I would, Damien was doing me a favour by letting me stay in his house for free, the least I could do was help keep his family off his back. Well kind of.
Bella really hadn’t eased off, she told her future brother-in-law that it was time to stop making me his dirty little secret and Giovanna jumped right in too. Within twenty-four hours of our fake relationship, we were making plans for how to make it look real.
Giovanna had arranged for Mariah to sleepover so we could enjoy the night. She did so with a very obvious wink that made my stomach lurch. Not because the thought of being alone with Damien overnight was off-putting, the complete opposite. The thoughts of being alone with Damien and doing what real couples would do was very much a turn on. But we weren’t a real couple, we’d probably go out to dinner to prove we were dating, try not to look too awkward, then come home and go to bed in very different bedrooms.
