The raccoon tilted her head, as the creature shook its black, white, and grey head before giving her a chatter with her tiny black hands gesturing wildly.
Eloise rolled her eyes. "I'm not fat-shaming you. I'm worried about your cholesterol."
"Is raccoon cholesterol a concern?" Tilly asked.
Eloise shrugged. She was wearing a short sleeved sweater with pink flowers cross-stitched over one shoulder, her auburn hair in a high and thick ponytail. "Honestly, no idea. But I'm trying to be responsible." She finally gave in with a sigh as she handed over half of a scone to the raccoon, who grabbed at it like shehadn't eaten in weeks before jumping down and running off down the hallway. Her three babies were undoubtedly running around somewhere.
"Speaking of," Tilly said as she took a seat at the island, "I should probably be watching my weight. I've gained twenty-two pounds."
Eloise frowned and stopped her task of filling a small china bowl with clotted cream as she looked over Tilly. "Since when?"
Tilly waved a hand. "Well, in the last five years, but still."
"Who hasn't at our age?"
"I doubt you've gained more than a pound even as you come closer to forty and your hormones have decided to go wild."Eloise gave her a look as she stepped back, turned around, giving Tilly her back, and lifted her sweater, grabbing at her hips.
"What do you call this?" she asked over her shoulder. Her red-painted nails squeezed the love handles there. "Huh?"
Tilly laughed and jumped down from the stool with the challenge. She raised an arm and wiggled. "I see your love handle and raise you a bat wing."
Eloise frowned and then slapped her denim-clad butt. "I see your bat wing and raise you at least two pounds in each of these cheeks."
"Oh yeah?" Tilly lifted her polka-dot sweater and grabbed her belly. "See this?" She hula hooped her hips as Eloise wiggled her ass, one hand still holding her love handle on one side as her other hand grabbed her buttcheek.
Then someone delicately cleared their throat, and both women froze in variously outrageous positions as they looked over at Ursula, who was holding a bunch of flowers and staring at them with two raised dark eyebrows nearly disappearing under the brim of her floppy gardening hat.
"I know we've done a lot of weird things together, but I am absolutely concerned now."
Eloise and Tilly looked at each other, each with a look like they'd been caught with their hands in the proverbial crystal skull cookie jar before they righted their clothes. Eloise silently resumed getting the scones ready as Tilly sat back down.
"Tilly thinks she's fat." Eloise's words, brash and to the point, made Ursula's green gaze swing toward their friend in concern.
"I didn't say I was fat. I said I had gained weight, which concerns me."
"And so you were comparing your weight gain?" Ursula asked carefully as she pulled out gardening shears from her apron and started cutting stems. The black irises made a dramatic and lovely bouquet that she placed in a floral, antique vase one by one. "Because I've got thighs that don't remember what a gap is."
She smirked at them, and they laughed.
"Pretty sure that was an unhealthy way to start our day," Eloise voiced as she pushed the wooden tray of scones, clotted cream, and what looked like her homemade sea salt and honey butter into the center of the island.
"Meh, I'd rather get out the unhealthy critical thoughts with you guys than keep them buried inside me, leaving them tothe voices," Tilly replied thoughtfully. "I feel better. So what if we've gained some weight?"
Eloise slid a black cat mug full of steaming coffee toward her.
"Yeah, who the hell cares? We look great. I feel great. Frankly, we're breathtaking creatures that this world is lucky to see walk its grounds."
Ursula smeared clotted cream over a scone as she said, "I love how you keep our heads up, Little Mermaid."
Eloise winked and lifted her raccoon cup of coffee to her lips.
"Ohmygosh, are these peach and clove?"
"That they are. Our peach tree has been overly generous." She leaned over the island and lowered her voice. "Don't tell it I saidanything, but ever since I've been sleeping inside the house, I think it's begging for attention. We get too many peaches."
"I can try and sell them at my flower cart," Ursula suggested.
"Please. And if you don't sell them, give them away."
