“Answer me. How long can you make him happy, Sebastian?”
I lifted my chin. How many times had I faced someone who saw me as worthless because of my race? Less smart, less strong, just less. I fought to prove myself constantly. This was just more of the same. But it wasn't a bunch of students or courtiers I sought to sway this time. It was a god. And he was resolute. Ranu had put me through horrible torment for nothing. It angered me, but not for myself. Fuck, I was used to this shit. No, it angered me because Shale would suffer. I saw him in my mind once more, reaching for me, tears in his eyes. Despite Ranu purifying Shale's love, the return of it would hurt him. Shale would trade one heartache for another. One deadmate in exchange for a dead lover. It wouldn't kill him, but it would still hurt.
“It will be less painful for him to lose you now, then after he's loved you and lived with you for years,” Ranu said.
“You can hear my thoughts?”
“You are only thoughts here.”
“Then you know that it doesn't matter. I promised to hold on, and I will. Love can be selfless and selfish at the same time.”
“How much of each?”
“What?”
Ranu tightened his hold on me. “How much of your love is selfish and how much selfless, Sebastian? Is it selfless enough to give up everything for him?”
“You're asking me to die for him?”
“I'm offering you a choice. I like giving choices.”
“What's the choice?”
“I can send you back now, without his love but alive, and you can live with him until you die.”
“Or?”
“You can give yourself to me, a true sacrifice, and I will send his love back to him.”
“You were going to do that anyway. And it will still hurt Shale.”
“You don't understand. If you give yourself to me here—not just die here, but give yourself to me—you will cease to exist out there. I will consume your essence, and he will forget all about you. But Shaleros will be able to love again. He will be happier than you could ever make him.”
I couldn't speak. Couldn't breathe. Give up my essence? Not just my life, but also my soul? But how many years did I have anyway? And how many did Shale have? I had found love. I had felt true happiness. Maybe it was enough.
“You'll consume my soul?” I asked.
“Yes. You will not go on to an afterlife. If there is one for humans.”
“You don't know?”
“There is none for immortals.”
“Holy shit. Then why do they bother worshiping you?”
“Because I am their father, and I can help them here, while they live. I am their god, their creator. But I am not yours, Sebastian. So I will gladly take your essence and savor it. It will strengthen me as food gives you strength. Or you may leave now.” He started to let go of me.
“Do it!” I clutched at his shoulders. “Consume me and give Shale back his love.”
Ranu's eyes flashed, his lips parted with a sigh, and he looked to his left. An orb of soft pink light appeared. Shale's love. It was so beautiful. So perfect. Untouched by sadness. Purified by a god. It shone without blinding. I could feel it inside me. Pouring through me. For a few moments, it was mine.
“Thank you,” I whispered, my stare locked on love.
“Thank you for your sacrifice, Sebastian.” Then Ranu struck.
His bite wasn't the bliss that Shale's was. But it didn't hurt either. Nothing hurt when I looked upon Shale's love. I felt the pull. The draw of the God. I was being diminished. Every moment took more of me. Ranu growled and worried at my throat. I poured into him. Then his hand shot out toward the pink orb, and Shale's love went flying back to him.
I smiled to see it go. Because far off, down a dark corridor, Shale waited. I saw him standing there, still reaching for me. Love lit the corridor, coloring the stones pink, then slammed into the Dragon King. As the last of me went into the God, Shale was freed. In so many ways.
