Like him abusing and terrifying you?my inner voice asked.
But Rian wouldn't abuse me. I knew that. And he only scared me because I wasn't prepared for his reaction. His tone had reminded me of King Dhrostan. Not the words, the King of Vix had never coveted me as Rian did. But King Dhrostan had sounded nearly identical when he had demanded to fuck me in front of Rontor.
I shuddered, the memory of my last time with Rontor souring further. I had been an active participant, and that made it worse. I was the one who convinced Rontor to have a threesome with the King. Until that very moment, sitting in that forest with Rian, I had believed that it was what I wanted. One last memory of the man I loved. But now, I saw it as another of King Dhrostan's triumphs over me. Yet another way he had made me feel small. Worthless. Unloved.
“Galin!” Rian shook me.
I flinched and focused on his face. This Dragon King. Not Dhrostan. This was Rianvar, and he was nothing like King Dhrostan. He was more like Rontor, but even that comparisonpaled. Rian was Rian. It wasn't fair to color him with the poison Dhrostan had left in me.
“I'm sorry,” I said. “I was lost in my thoughts.”
“I said your name three times.” Rian frowned. “What were you thinking about with so much focus?” He scowled deeper to add, “Right in the middle of our important conversation.”
“I thought you said it was silly?”
“Galin,” Rian growled.
“King Dhrostan,” I admitted. “I was thinking about King Dhrostan.”
Rian jerked back as if I'd slapped him.
“I know you're not like him,” I hurried to say. “But something in your tone reminded me of him.”
“Just now?” he asked, easing back toward me.
“No, earlier. When you were talking about hunting me.”
“He threatened to hunt you too?”
“No. He didn't care enough about me to do that. He . . . just . . .”
“Galin, what did he do to you?”
“It's complicated.”
“Whatever he did, was it done before or after you met Rontor?”
“It was because of Rontor.” I shook my head. “I can't talk about it. It's too humiliating.” I snorted. “Although, I've never thought it so before now.”
“I see,” Rian said stiffly.
“Rian, you don't want to hear about this. Especially now, when you're so volatile. Trust me.”
“I imagine you're right.”
“To answer your earlier question, yes.”
“Yes?” Rian lifted his head.
“Yes, I do think I could pretend that your outbursts are part of our sex play. If I'm prepared, I think the fear will be exciting.”
He let out a deep sigh. “Thank you. It will pass, Galin. I promise. It's normal for a Dragon to get unsettled like this about his mate.”
“IfI'm your mate.”
“You are. You'll see.” Rian grimaced and added, “Either that, or you're driving me mad.”
Chapter Nineteen
