“But you have proof of his crime. You can use that against him.” I looked at Kon. “Vow that you won't come after him if he lets you go.”
“Not happening,” Kon said.
“Kon, please!”
“Misha, do not let this break you,” Konstantin's stare softened. “Do not let my death be yours. You are the true king. And you have been more of a king to your people while being a consort than he has while wearing his stolen crown. You are noble and good and true. And I love you.”
“Oh, get him the fuck out of here,” Nikolay muttered.
The knights dragged Konstantin out through the backdoor.
“Kon!” I screamed and tried to follow him. Niko held me back, but I thrashed in his hold. “Konstantin, I love you!”
And I finally meant it. I knew what love was now. I knew how to love myself and him. And I loved him. Truly, completely loved him.
Niko shoved me at a couple of knights, and they yanked me back. The faint roar of a tiger came from outside, then went abruptly silent. I sagged between the knights and began to weep.
“Take them to the dungeon. All of them,” Nikolay said to the guards. To me, he added, “A night down there should sweeten you back to your usual self.”
I just continued to dangle between the guards, sobbing brokenly. I'd finally fallen in love, finally felt it, and it was instantly taken from me. Nothing Nikolay said or did mattered in light of that.
“Oh, for fuck's sake. Get him out of my sight.” Then Niko glanced around the room. “Where the fuck is Dmitry?!”
Chapter Forty-One
The cells below the Larch Castle weren't those open barred sort where misery could be shared and prisoners could keep each other company, clanging metal cups and the like. Instead, they were bleak stone rooms with no windows, not even in the steel doors. I was shoved into one of them and had only a few moments to see that there was no bed or blanket, only a bucket in the corner. When the door shut, only a sliver of light remained, leaving me in darkness so desolate, I felt blind.
It was perfect.
I collapsed to the floor, still manacled. I barely noticed the lack of magic running through me. The sorrow—bone-deep and chilling—overtook all else.
Konstantin was dead. The man who had taught me that I was more than property. That I had strength inside me. That I had love. He was gone. Murdered. Lying dead on the cold forest floor, food for beasts. Denied even a proper burial.
Tears streamed down my face and sobs sent my body into convulsions. I wailed. I screamed. I mourned until my throat closed, my nose filled, and I couldn't breathe. Then I laid there, still as death, hoping the mimicry would summon it to me. Praying that I would follow Konstantin and not have to see those brave people hang as my wings were broken. Pinioned. Grounded forever. Shackled to the man who had killed everyone I loved.
Nikolay's machinations were so clear now. Murdering Timofey, Sofia, and Milana for discovering his dirty secret. Covering up those murders. Manipulating Konstantin so that he'd have leverage if needed. Then Andrei. Niko must have heard us talking about the Master Librarian and knew we were going to push Andrei to the point of confessing. But Andrei hid. Not from us, from the King. He might have lived if he hadn't come back to meet me. To show me that picture and confess his role in the death of my family. Not just my family but an entire village. The real Lebedev Court. Nikolay had killed them all just to ensure the end of my line.
Then spared me anyway.
It explained so much. His tight hold on me. The way he'd seduced me at such a young age. How he would adore me one second and revile me the next. His punishments and pleasures. The man was fucking psychotic, but it was crazy brilliance. His father had taught him well. And Niko was right; he would have gotten away with it if my father hadn't been such a great man. If he hadn't inspired such loyalty that even now, years after his death, his people were inspired to fight for his son, simply because of a resemblance.
I started crying again. For my parents. For all they had lost. For my brother whose name I'd forgotten. For my people who would suffer under Nikolay's rule. For those who had been brave enough to plot against a king and would now be hung for it. But most of all, for Konstantin, who had no part in this other than justice. And me. He had come to help us and now lay dead. My handsome tiger, so strong and full of life, was dead.
As I lay on the cold stone, accepting what had happened as my father once accepted his fate, I knew that part of me had died with Kon in that forest. This time, my heart wouldn't recover. Nikolay Kemarre had destroyed it completely.
My love had been like a butterfly, breaking out of its cocoon only to fly for a brief time. Now that it had fallen, it would never rise again.
Chapter Forty-Two
Morning came. I knew it was morning because my door opened and a robe was tossed at me. I was ordered to change into it, one of my manacles removed to assist me, then replaced after I was dressed. I didn't fight the guards, not as they shackled me or as I was dragged from my cell, head hanging and body limp. I had no fight left in me.
I squinted as light bombarded me, then winced at the bite of cold air. Lifting my head, I saw that I was in the castle's main courtyard and it was full of people—courtiers and villagers alike. I wouldn't have known it if I hadn't looked; they were so silent. So grim. Watching me with hollow stares.
Those stares shot through me and jolted something inside.
I straightened. Put my feet down. Lifted my chin. I wouldn't go to my fate like a victim. I had spent my whole life as one, and I refused to be that man anymore. I refused to whimper and cringe. To bow and scrape and bend over for Nikolay. He may have won, but I was still alive. These people were still alive. For them, I would find the will to stand up to Nikolay. To face him and deny him. For my parents, my brother, and Konstantin.
Then I saw Gleb.
