“If he keeps me just to save face, I'd leave him,” I said firmly. “Fuck, if he fucks around on me, I'll leave him. I'm not gonna put up with that shit.”
“Seriously?” Tod grimaced. “I thought you gays were more open-minded about sex?”
“Open-minded doesn't mean we let our lovers cheat on us,” I huffed, knowing he didn't mean anything by it. Tod was just, well, just a straight man. He didn't get it. He thought that having two guys in a relationship meant lots of sex and no games. “I want something real with him, not just to fuck around.”
“All right, man, I get that,” Tod toned it down. “But if you care about him, wouldn't you try to forgive him if he slips? I mean, it must be harder on him if he likes guys and girls.”
“Harderon him?” I gaped at Tod. “Why would liking both sexes make it harder to be faithful? Loyalty is about one person; it shouldn't matter what sex I am.”
“Tod, you're an idiot.” Vanessa shook her head sadly at him.
“So I've been told.” Tod grinned. “Sorry, Shane. I didn't mean to step on your little faerie toes.”
“It's fine.” I handed the tray to Van and hugged him, then switched the tray to Tod to hug Vanessa. “I just came by to thank you for the goodies and tell you goodbye. I don't know how long I'll be in Varalorre.”
“I'm so jealous,” Vanessa exclaimed. “You have to tell us everything when you get back.”
“I promise. And I'll check out the chef scene for you guys.”
“Yes! That's what I'm talking about.” Tod slapped my shoulder again. “You're the best, bro.”
“That's Falcon Valorian to you,” I said primly, then we all burst into laughter.
“What changed your mind?” Vanessa asked once we settled down. “You were so adamant against this.”
I sighed and glanced back toward the Falcon Lord's tent. “He did. I almost died in the battle. I was out on the beach, fighting beside a Glastig, when the Farungals started to retreat. We got caught in the swarm. We were done for, but then I heard this shriek and there he was. Taeven swooped down and picked us both up, then carried us to safety.”
“He carriedtwomen?” Tod's eyes went wide. “Isn't that a lot for a faerie?”
I blinked. I hadn't thought of that. “Yeah, I guess it is.”
“Adrenaline can give you extra strength,” Vanessa said softly. “Fear for a loved one can especially do it.”
My jaw clenched. “He doesn't love me. Flat out told me so after I confessed that I love him.”
“What?” Vanessa gaped at me. “And you still agreed to be his valorian?”
“Two things convinced me. First, he admitted that he didn't share my feelings, but he does care deeply for me. He didn't have to do that; he could have easily lied to get me to accept his offer. And he told me he's never cared so much for anyone before; that although he doesn't love me now, he's certain he will.”
“Sounds like a load of shit to me,” Tod growled, fingering a knife on his belt.
“Could be,” I conceded. “But I don't think so. I saw his soul, Tod. When he gave me a piece of his soul, I saw it. He's . . . he's a good man. I know I can trust him.”
Tod grunted thoughtfully.
“What's the second reason?” Van asked.
“When I was staring down a horde of Farungals, my thoughts were all about him,” I whispered. “I regretted not accepting his offer, if only because it would have given me one more day with him.”
Vanessa made a soft whimper. “That's so fucking beautiful.”
“Saps,” Tod said affectionately.
“After he saved us, I knew I had to accept his offer,” I concluded. “Even if I didn't get to have him forever, I still wanted whatever I could get. It was too late to reject him. I love him.”
“You sure do fall in love fast,” Tod muttered.
“Not usually,” I protested. “But that day we spent together was pretty amazing. I'll tell you guys about it later, though. I've still got to say goodbye to the others, and I don't have much time.”
