“Then why can't you just relax and enjoy the outing?”
“The outing?” I chuckled. “You sound like one of those rich people from the cities.”
He lifted a brow. “I am one of those rich people from the cities, except that my city is in Varalorre.”
“Why did you leave?”
“Excuse me?” Taeven blinked in surprise.
“Why did you leave Varalorre?” I clarified. “You were safe there, but you came here to lead an army. Why? And don't give me that line about honor and duty. I get it; you're all honorable for coming here to help us. But what's the other reason?”
“Does there have to be another one?” he whispered, looking distant suddenly.
“To inspire you to take the position of warlord?” I countered. “Yeah, you must be after something more than glory on the battlefield. You wanted to open up to me. So, do it. Tell me why you accepted the position.”
“Itwasfor glory, but not on the battlefield,” he admitted. “I . . . oh, fuck, I've never told anyone this.”
I leaned back to give him some space. “You don't have to do it now. You hardly know me. I'd understand if you don't want to bare your secrets.”
“Tell me one of yours first.” Taeven got that cunning look again.
“I don't have any juicy secrets.” I shrugged. “I'll tell you anything you want to know.”
“I want to know asecret,” he insisted. “Something you haven't told anyone.”
I gave it some thought. I didn't want to make it sexual, but those were the only secrets I had; everything else wasn't personal enough to hide. And, frankly, the only reason I hid the sexual things was that Stalanians were so repressed when it came to homosexuals. As in, they didn't tolerate us. At all. Fucking prudes.
“All right. I lost my virginity to my older brother's friend. We had this secret affair for almost a year and then he got married to a woman. I was devastated.”
Taeven considered this. “He was bisexual?”
“No, I don't think so. He got married because it was expected of him.”
“Then why didn't he marry you?”
I blinked. Holy shit, he didn't understand. I knew the Fae were accepting of both gays and lesbians, that even some of their monarchs were, but I didn't think they were ignorant of how things were in Stalana. Especially since this particular faerie had been living in Stalana for a long time.
“Only straight people are accepted here,” I said. “Any other choice is scorned and will get you ostracized. Or worse. That's why our affair was secret.”
“What?” Taeven looked horrified. “I assumed it was secret because he was your brother's friend. But you're saying that you would have been ridiculed for being with another man?”
“Ridiculed is the least of what would have happened to us.”
“And the worst?”
“We would have been murdered, possibly by a mob. Likely in a very grisly way.”
Taeven straightened, his expression going from horror to fury. “What?!”
“Yeah, I know. It's bullshit. And it's why I've been planning on moving to Lek after I get out of the army.”
“Moving?”
“Yeah, Lekians don't give a shit about who you want to fuck. They're cool like that.” I grinned. “Hell, they're cool in a lot of ways.”
“I've never been to Lek,” he murmured, still trying to process what I'd told him. “Have you?”
“Yeah, my parents took me and my brother when we were younger. It's amazing. Always warm and sunny without being humid, and the grasslands are the color of honey. It's like an ocean of gold stretching beneath a brilliant blue sky.”
