“I'm sure that we can help you with that,” King Draven smiled wickedly.
“Shut up, Draven,” the other kings said in unison.
Chapter Five
George the Hatter's cottage wasn't connected to the rest of Underland. It was a precaution in case his eccentricity drew too much attention instead of dissuading it. So, we had to trek back into Tulgey Wood to find an entrance to Underland. At least this time, I didn't have to drink anything.
The entrance was under a rock, and all sorts of jokes popped into my mind when I first saw it. But the timing was inappropriate, everyone looking over their shoulder's anxiously, so I kept my humor to myself. Beneath the rock was a spiraling set of stairs which we took down to a tunnel. After about an hour of navigating the maze of tunnels below Wonderland, we finally came to a settlement.
An empty room was located for me, and I was escorted into it by all three kings. They bid me goodnight at the door, and then I shut it on their handsome faces. I just couldn't take anymore strange. I bolted the door for good measure. Then I went straight to the bed and fell into it, fully clothed.
I woke up hours later, though it seemed like mere minutes. My mouth tasted like something had died in it, and my hair was as wild as my elusive magic. I stumbled across the room to the bathroom to remedy both matters. A hot shower and some aggressive gargling later, and I came out into the bedroom refreshed and ready to take on the world... a world I had never even known existed.
I was about to get into my dirty dress when a knock interrupted me.
“Your Majesty, I have a change of clothes for you,” a female voice came through the door.
“It's safe, Queen Alice,” Nick called out.
I opened the door wrapped in a towel, and Nick quickly turned his back. There was a woman holding a stack of clothing, and she just smiled, bobbed a curtsy, and came into the room. I shut the door behind her.
“I'm Beth, Your Majesty,” the girl said. “The King of Diamonds has sent these to you with his highest regard.”
“Oh, well, if it's hishighestregard.” I rolled my eyes, and Beth giggled.
“His Majesty hasn't given any woman his attention since the Queen of Diamonds was killed.” Beth cast me a sideways glance as she laid the clothing on the bed.
“Oh, damn,” I huffed. “Thank you for reminding me. I completely forgot that his wife was killed. I probably would have said something insensitive and then felt like a horrible ass.”
Beth's eyes went wide.
“Yeah, that was probably the wrong thing to say too,” I muttered.
“Not at all, Queen Alice,” Beth hastened to reassure me. “I was just surprised at how much you sound like your mother.”
“You think so too, huh?” I frowned, wondering about that whole Nature versus Nurture thing.
“Oh, yes. You look a lot like her as well.” Beth smiled. “It's no wonder that you have the kings in such a state.”
“The kings?” I lifted my brows. “You think they like me? Like,reallylike me? Oh, God, what am I saying? Don't answer that, Beth. I've just lost my uncle and have tumbled down a rabbit hole into a weird world where I'm evidently queen. The last thing I need is a romantic entanglement.”
“Or three,” she added helpfully.
“Yes, quite right; or three.” I blinked. “As if I could have a relationship with three men at the same time.”
“Oh, but don't you know?” Beth asked. “The original wild queens were always married to four men; her Card Kings. That's how Wonderland is meant to be ruled. Queen Julia, your mother, broke tradition and married your father, who wasn't a king at all. It put Wonderland into a tizzy and had all sorts of repercussions.”
“Like what?”
“Oh, like the kings choosing their own wives,” Beth said. “I hope that you don't think that I'm speaking ill of your mother, Your Majesty. Queen Julia was a wonderful queen, but if she had only stuck to tradition, the Queen of Hearts would never have risen to power.”
“Go on,” I urged. “Tell me it all.”
“Well, once the Queen of the Wilds announced that she'd only be marrying one man, and he, a Cheshire Wolf, no less–”
“Hold on,” I interrupted her. “I'm half wolf?”
“Oh no, Your Majesty.”
