His hand fell away.
“I loved Tiernan, and yet, slowly, you wedged your way into my heart,” I stroked the glowing kuperi before me, then nudged it gently back towards its friends. “Then I loved you both. That has haunted me. The fact that I could love him, and still fall for you. I felt fickle and disloyal. Dishonest. And sometimes I wonder if you can see it,” I looked to him. “How could you not? I loved Tiernan, but I still went to you in the end. You must think me incapable of being true to one man. So, why do you love me?”
Raza swallowed hard, his gaze flickering to Tiernan before settling back on me.
“I don't believe that love is finite,” he said. “Nor do I think you fickle or incapable of being true to me. I think the heart, with all of its layered emotions, is complicated. Loving one person doesn't negate the feelings you have for another. The fey have long recognized this, and that's why we don't put restrictions on our relationships. No limits and no judgments.”
“But I didn't want that; an open relationship,” I whispered. “Tiernan didn't, and now you don't either.”
“We decided to go another way, to focus solely on each other,” Raza sighed deeply. “But that doesn't change what you feel.”
“I'm sorry,” I whispered. “I want to be with you. I've made my decision. I'll get over Tiernan. I just needed to be a friend to him tonight.”
“I love you, mo shíorghrá,” Raza took my hand. “And that means I want you to be happy. Killing a piece of your heart won't make you happy.”
“Neither will hurting yours,” I leaned forward to kiss him. “I'm a big girl, I can deal with this. Loving you is not a tragedy, Raza. It's a blessing,”
Raza shook his head and frowned.
“If you developed feelings for another woman, I wouldn't tolerate it,” I said firmly. He jerked his gaze to mine. “I wouldn't accept it. I would leave you, and possibly get violent on my way out.”
“I know,” he said.
“You don't think that's unfair?” I asked. “Horrible of me? Selfish?”
“Maybe a little selfish,” he smiled. “But you were raised human. It's hard enough for you to accept that you can love more than one man, to expect you to accept that I could love multiple women, would be too much.”
I scowled and looked away from him. Even hearing him talk about the possibility of him loving another woman made me irrationally angry.
“So it's a good thing I can't love another,” Raza whispered.
“You can't?” I looked back to him.
“There's no one else for me, Seren,” Raza said simply. “I've lived long enough, and been with enough women, to know that. You're the love of my very long life.”
I fell into his embrace, my face tucking into the hollow of his throat. His arms came around me, and I sighed. This was how I should have felt earlier, with his wing around me. This peaceful bliss. This was what being with Raza was like for me.
“If you will be my queen, commit to me in marriage, then I will allow you to have other consorts,” Raza said softly. “You won't have to feel guilty for not allowing me the same freedom you have. It's against our laws for a married king to have consorts.”
I closed my eyes and hid my face in his chest. I felt him lay his cheek against the top of my head, his heartbeat steady in my ear. This wasn't the place for that discussion, if there even was a good place for it. I didn't want to answer him, my mind was whirling and my heart racing. How could Raza be so calm? How could he simply offer me this, after all those vows between us? The things he said about wanting me only for himself. The way he sat there, so angry, just minutes earlier. How could he shift so quickly? It made my head spin.
“Easy, mo shíorghrá,” Raza stroked my hair. “You're letting your human side confuse you. Just as I let my dragon nature confuse me. Love cannot be possessive. I know that now. I have to be generous with you, or I'll smother the very parts of you I love the most. This doesn't mean that I desire you less or that I love you less. Even now, my dragon roars at me for my betrayal. But my love for you is stronger than he is. It's stronger than my love for him.”
“I can't,” I pulled away from him. “I can't cause this conflict in you and be content. Don't you understand that? Just as you want me to be happy, so do I want you to be happy.”
“Having you for my wife will make me supremely happy,” Raza smiled. “Enough to accept whatever brings you joy.”
“Marriage,” I let out a long breath.
“You say you love me,” Raza stroked the amethyst stripe in my hair. “You say it's forever. So why do these vows frighten you?”
“This isn't the time,” I shook my head. “Moire... the witches... the elves.”
“I refuse to let these outside influences dictate my life,” Raza declared.
I stared at his beautiful face, at the lines of his wings rising proudly behind him. His golden eyes glowed with his passion, while his chest rose and fell steadily with conviction. He was ready to give me everything, all of himself and his kingdom. And more. I glanced at Tiernan and found him staring at us intently. Silver eyes flashed, and I looked back to Raza's golden gaze. Silver and gold. Seelie and Unseelie. With Twilight the green between. Perhaps wewerefated to be.
“You're right,” I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I love you. Forever. I accept your proposal, Raza. I'll marry you.”
