The first time I pulled out my card at the bookstore, I barely managed to make it to the car before the panic attack took over.
I thought I was dying. I felt dizzy and had images from the past filter through my brain like a fucked-up film reel.
I almost called Jack.
River was with me, so he calmed me down pretty fast, but he’d seen the card, so I knew there’d be a conversation when we got home.
Madden and Mona were at Toby’s, so I didn’t even have my cuddle buddy with me.
For a while, I wondered if I should just message Jack about what I’d done, but I wasn’t ready yet.
Then I used my card again while Theo took me to get groceries at the closest store to home.
“Are you sure about this?” he asked, guessing what I was going to do.
It struck me then that I needed to know what he thought. “Do you mind?”
For his credit, he didn’t say anything immediately. Instead, he took a deep breath and let it out slowly as he surveyed the parking lot stretching around us.
“No. It’s time. You’re an adult now. It’s not like your father will come in guns blazing, right?”
I smiled wryly. “No. But he will appear eventually.”
“He needs to find you first.”
Snorting, I held up my phone. “How do you feel about me posting on my old Instagram account?”
Theo looked at me seriously. “Only after Jack comes home.”
Sighing, I opened the car door. “I’m gonna buy so many expensive eggs with this card.”
Theo laughed. Hard.
* * * *
When I’d sat down in the living room to tell my family everything that had happened to me, I still couldn’t. Not every detail. I would only tell Jack that, I’d decided. Maybe a therapist, because I really needed to get a good one.
The ones present for my story had been Lake and River, their guys, and Madden. Hudson had been there via a video call. Their reactions had been what I’d expected, with Hudson telling me he wanted to talk in private once I was done with what I wanted to share.
I’d gone to Lake’s office and propped my phone against Lake’s computer screen.
“Do you need anything from me?” Hudson asked immediately. “And is there anything I need to know as your lawyer?”
I blinked at him. “You’re my lawyer?”
“Obviously, unless you have another one?” He raised a brow at me, grinning.
“Oh, I called one of the dozen others I know, sure.” I rolled my eyes. Then I thought about it. “I, uh, didn’t see anything bad and I haven’t done anything illegal, either. I know something did happen but didn’t witness it.”
He nodded slowly. “Okay.” Then he thought for a moment. “I think you’ll need all your paperwork, right?”
“Yeah. I have my ID still, so that helps, right?”
“It does, yes. But you’ll need your birth certificate and other stuff, too. Do you want me to look into it for you?”
I shook my head. “Not yet. I want to see what my dad does first.”
“Okay. Let me know if you need anything. Legal or not, Rey. Seriously.” He grimaced. “I recognized your father’s name, that’s all.”
