Instead, I curled up on my bed and tried to look into the future where he’d be back one day. I still needed to figure out how to make that happen.
Chapter 22
Cook
I spent about a week wallowing on Rhi’s couch, and then Samira came home. She took one look at me, grabbed her laptop, and worked on it for about half an hour. Then she presented me with said laptop.
“There are tabs open. These are local therapists who have openings for intensive therapy from now until New Year’s. Pick one.” With that, she left me sitting there and went to make coffee.
She was definitely her mother’s daughter.
I picked a woman around my age and made an appointment. I was long due anyway. I did notice that all three therapists Samira had suggested had LGBTQ friendly in their bios, too.
Dr. Alonzo saw me at her little office about a thirty-minute walk away from Rhiannon’s. It was just enough time for me to gather myself and to start freaking the fuck out.
Luckily, before I could talk myself out of it, I was there, and she greeted me at the tiny front desk.
“My assistant has a day off,” she explained after greeting me. “It’ll just be the two of us.”
I followed her into a cozy, living room-like space. There was a desk shoved in a corner, but other than that, it wasn’t what I’d expected. Not that I really knew what Ihadbeen expecting if I was honest.
“Take a seat wherever you feel comfortable.”
After I sat on a randomly chosen spot on one of the couches, she sat on another one across the coffee table.
“Now, first of all, what’s your preferred name and pronouns?” she asked in a casual, friendly tone.
I found myself smiling as I replied, “My name is Jack Cook, and either Jack or Cook is fine. And he/him, please.”
She made a note, then looked at me contemplatively and asked, “I heard something in your voice when you said either Jack or Cook. Is there a significance to each name?”
How she understood that so easily, I don’t know, but I gave her kudos anyway.
“I’ve been called Cook for most of my life. First in the Army and then after, when I decided to pursue a career in the culinary world, it was funny to most people, so it just stuck.”
She nodded understandingly. “And who is Jack for?”
I glanced out of her window at the boring buildings across the street as I gathered my thoughts. “Jack was always for family. Blood family, I mean.”
I explained about Twin Star and Ruth, and everyone else there.
“They all called you Cook, too?”
“Mostly, yeah. But then…I don’t know. When Lake, River, and Rey arrived, things started to change in that way, too.”
“Can you tell me more about Rey?” she asked in a kind tone.
Of course, she’d picked up on how I felt for Rey even though I’d tried to be brief when explaining who he was in the bigger picture.
“He’s probably the love of my life,” I blurted out, then immediately felt like facepalming. “I mean—”
“No, let’s go with that,” Dr. Alonzo said firmly. “Rey is the love of your life. Tell me more about him?”
Sighing, I tried not to wring my hands. “He’s young, but he’s…I know he’s gone through something pretty bad with his family. Lost his mom young, his dad is some sort of a criminal. He basically ran away from home because he wasn’t feeling safe.” I sighed again. “He hasn’t told me or anyone else details, but I may have used some less than legal but completely safe for him means to look into his family just to be sure he wasn’t in active danger.”
She nodded slowly. “What’s he like?”
I smiled widely. “He’s bright and inquisitive and so, so kind. He wants to know about things, but not in that scattered way some people do. He’s so into cooking and learning about animals, especially horses, that everyone around the rescue thinks he’ll either end up being a chef or a veterinarian once he can study without being afraid of his family.”
