I still wondered sometimes, if it would’ve been different with my first crush. Sighing, I watched as Theo walked a couple of the horses to the back paddock.
I guess the dogs smelled me, because Dorothy, one of the GGs, ambled around the corner of the house like a dog-shaped ghost and came to get pats.
“You having a good morning, girl?”
She wagged her tail and put her giant blue head on my lap. She sighed, as if having been woken up at this hour was beyond her understanding and nerve. I knew she’d been fed already; that was always the first thing Theo did, apparently.
“Shouldn’t you go back to Theo?” I scratched her behind the ears with my free hand.
With a put-upon sigh, she turned around and walked away. I loved the dogs; they were all such characters, even if the GGs liked to meld into the surroundings a bit. They were guard dogs and looked the part, even though they were all gentle and loving.
I sipped my coffee and then leaned back, closing my eyes for a bit. I often wondered if I’d actually been in love with my first crush. I’d never felt anything like what I’d felt toward him after.
Not even when I’d tried dating after I moved to New Jersey for nursing school. Of course, by then I had the side hustle of escorting to pay the bills, because my parents were firm believers one should make their own way.
Being an escort didn’t exactly make you boyfriend material for most of the “good guys” out there. The kind my parents would’ve accepted with open arms as they would any man their son brought home.
They’d liked my first crush. He’d been nerdy and a bit shy and awkward, but he was whip smart and well-behaved. Too bad I never had the guts to ask him out, as much as we had hung out by the end.
When we were sixteen, his mother decided to homeschool him for some reason, and our time together grew shorter and shorter. Then summer vacation came and I visited his place until things changed, and I only saw him once after that.
Ben had been…everything. This bright light that attracted me like a moth. I still couldn’t explain why that was. My other crushes after him had all been more typically handsome, more outgoing and, what my sister would’ve called “normal.”
Yet my heart was still pining for the chubby boy with freckles and red hair who chewed the ends of his pencils and hated when people were loud in the library when we were trying to study.
* * * *
I made breakfast and handed Lake his coffee when he wandered in just before nine.
“Thank you,” he groaned in his morning-rough voice.
I loved him like a brother. He was kind and giving, and despite being a bit lost when we first met while working as escorts, he’d found his way. Kind of. Because he’d gotten his job in New York in a way that was connected to his escorting.
He didn’t like it, even though technically he hadn’t slept with someone to get the job. The fact that he’d worked at a bookstore, had loved Anneliese Harris’s novels more than any others and then found out his aunt RuthwasHarris…well, that was a whole other mindfuck.
Now he had the book rights and a request from Ruth’s agent to see if Lake as the superfan and nephew could finish the manuscript she hadn’t had time to before her premature death of a heart condition nobody knew she’d had.
I knew Lake could do it, as much as he doubted himself. The agent had even asked for Ruth’s editor to come over to help him with the story and whatever finishing a book entailed. Oh, and of course Lake was head over heels in crush with Theo. After a rocky start, they were drawn to one another like magnets.
If only I could find someone like that one day, too.
* * * *
A couple of days later, a friend of Theo’s called for help. Lake left with him to go get some horses because we had space at Twin Star.
I spent the morning applying for nursing positions within a decent distance, and then, just as I was about to give up on life, my phone rang.
“Hello?”
“Good morning; am I speaking with River Lynch?” an even, deep voice asked.
“This is he.”
“I’m Dr. Toby Cobb, I’m calling because you contacted me for the position I have open at my new clinic.”
I did a little jig right there on the couch. “Yes, Dr. Cobb, I’ve been trying to find a job in the Joliet area.”
“Well, I’d like to invite you for an interview this afternoon, if you have time? Tomorrow works as well.”
