“Breathe,” Nathaniel whispered, both his hands on my shoulders as he crouched down in front of me. “Breathe, Augustus. In and out. Just like that.”
I inhaled when Nathaniel inhaled, exhaled when he exhaled. A security guard approached with a plastic cup of water, and I drowned it in one go to cool my burning throat. The gallery had been emptied of people, no doubt frightened from the screaming mad man. What was happening to me? It had never gotten this bad before. Was I completely losing my mind?
“Are you sure you don’t want me to call someone?” I heard the security guard ask Nathaniel.
“No, it’s okay, I’ll take care of him,” Nathaniel replied. “We’ll leave now so we don’t cause any more disruptions. I apologise for the inconvenience.”
I let Nathaniel pull me to my feet and guide me back out into the carpark. He was speaking as he helped me into the car, but his words formed a string of nonsense I could not decipher. It wasn’t until we were pulling into the hospital car park that I snapped out of my daze and finally registered the words he was saying.
“…and we’ll just get you checked out in case maybe you’ve taken something that’s making you unwell…”
“I haven’t taken any drugs!” I snapped.
Nathaniel blinked, whether surprised by my snap or simply that I’d finally spoken, I didn’t know. “Okay,” he said, calmly, “but I still think we should let a doctor take a look at you.”
He unbuckled his seatbelt while I sat, unmoving.
There was no way I was going inside a hospital. All I wanted to do was go home, sleep, and then have dinner with Auden. If I went inside the hospital, I wasn’t sure who would come back out.
“Augustus,” Nathaniel sighed. “I don’t know what happened back there. It was like…like you were somewhere else entirely.”
“It was a panic attack,” I said, glaring straight ahead of me as my hands curled and uncurled on my lap.
“Okay…but you couldn’t evenseeme. I was right in front of you and you–”
“I’m sorry if I scared you but I was having a panic attack that obstructed my vision and hearing,” I interrupted.
“You were hallucinating,” Nathaniel said, voice more firm now. “You were seeing something that scared you. You werescreaming.”
My hands trembled uncontrollably. I moved them under my thighs, my bottom lip caught between my teeth as tears pooled in my eyes. I didn’t want to cry. Not again.
“I’m not going to force you,” Nathaniel whispered, his hand resting on my knee. “But I really think you should. The doctors can organise an MRI or a CT scan and–”
I pushed his hand off my knee and climbed out of the car, slamming the door shut behind me. Nathaniel followed, his own door clicking shut quietly.
“Augustus–”
I didn’t wait to hear what he had to say—I ran. I ran until I reached a park bench and dumped myself down onto it, face buried in my hands. Nathaniel must have lost track of me, or given up, for I remained alone.
Never alone, little monster.
A quiet sob escaped the back of my throat, the Devil's clawed hands sliding over my shoulders, piercing through flesh. I still didn't know the truth. Was he real? Or was it all just in my head?
I didn’t remember how I got back home, only that when I did, Auden was reading a book on the couch, headphones on and uniform discarded for sweatpants and an oversized t-shirt. He looked up when I entered, and his eyes widened in a way that indicated I must have looked as bad as I felt. Not wanting him to see me in such a state, I shook my head and told him I was going to shower.
He was waiting in the hallway when I emerged from the bathroom in only a pair of black shorts, my wet curls slicked back away from my forehead.
“Are you okay?” he asked, following me into my bedroom.
“I’m fine, Audie,” I tried to give him a reassuring smile, “just tired.”
“Are you going to have dinner?”
“I think I’m just going to go to sleep. Are you okay to eat leftovers?”
“Yes, but–”
“Goodnight,” I announced as I flopped down on my bed.
