North Lane had no neighbours, but it was a believable lie since I had started getting into fights at school. Not the kind I had any chance of winning, but the kind that saw me on the ground, curled up in a ball, enduring the several pairs of feet striking my fragile body.
My year four teacher sent me home early on one autumn afternoon, my body aching from yet another fight I did not win.
I stepped up onto the front porch of North Lane and unlocked the door, stepping inside with an uneasy feeling in my chest. It was quiet except for the faint sound of music coming from my parents’ bedroom.
Lowering my school bag and discarding my shoes, I made my way through the living room and down the hallway toward Auden’s bedroom. He was asleep in his bed, one arm dangling toward the floor where his security blanket had fallen. I approached him with a fond smile, adjusting his arm so that it rested on his stomach, placing the security blanket on top of his thin body. Assured that he was safe, I kissed the top of his head and continued down the hall toward my parents’ bedroom, the music growing louder.
I knocked on the door, but there was no response.
I should have walked away. I should have waited in my room, and then maybe my world would not have shattered because of one stupid mistake.
I entered the room without an invitation, words locked in my throat the moment my eyes landed on a man on top of my mother, their limbs entangled in a passionate embrace.
“Mum?” I asked in alarm.
Her eyes flew open and the man on top of her turned around. It was not my father.
Joseph Kade blinked at me in stunned silence as I backed away, left shoulder knocking into the doorframe in my haste.
My mother called my name, but I ran. I ran until I was out the front door and into the woods, until my legs ached and I fell to the grass, gasping for air. I didn’t know where I was, but I was glad to be far from that bedroom.
My mother and…
…that monster.
It wasn’t that I was naive enough to believe my parents had a perfect marriage. I knew they had their problems, like many did, but they were God-fearing Christians. Adultery was a sin.
My mother had accused me of being a sinner my whole life. And yet there she was, underneath a man who was not her husband. She was a hypocrite.
I glanced down at my bruised wrists, the evidence of the punishment for my sins. Would my mother confine herself inside the linen cupboard or in a dark pool of water, alone and handcuffed like a criminal?
Of course not,the Devil growled,you will haveto make her.
I closed my eyes to shut him out. His thoughts were not my own. I would never lock my mother away. I couldn’t, even if I wanted to. God was on her side.
I do not recall how long I remained in the long grass, sobbing into the dirt, but the sun had barely grazed the horizon when I rose to my feet, a thick morning fog swallowing the House on North Lane. A lone leaf drifted in the ice cold breeze, falling at my feet as I pushed open the door.
A darkness had settled inside the House, a poison that devoured its very heart. The air was thick with rot, a dampness that wouldn’t dry out. Dust painted the dark oak furniture grey, cobwebs hanging from every corner of the ceiling. It was as though I had been gone years, instead of mere hours.
On the staircase, Auden coughed.
His arms were wrapped around his shivering body, dark circles under his pale blue eyes. I guided him up to the second floor, each step grunting beneath our weight. A dark corridor greeted us with a sinister hum, the walls pulsing with the sound of rats scurrying along the wooden beams.
Mold infiltrated my nostrils as my bedroom door creaked open, an ice-cold breeze from the shattered window lashing me like the sharp end of a whip.
I drew Auden close, securing him to my warmth as I wrapped him in a blanket. With his shoulders covered to fend off the chill, we ventured back out into the hallway and into the heart of North Lane.
The hallway light flickered as we neared Auden’s bedroom, casting taunting shadows that followed our every move.
We stepped inside the room and sighed with relief, the biting cold confined to the hallway as we shut the door behind us.
“You look like you haven’t slept,” I told Auden as I guided him into bed, tucking him in beneath the sheets.
He shifted closer to the wall, leaving room for me. I debated returning to the darkness to find my mother, but Auden’s pale cheeks and wide eyes convinced me to climb onto the mattress beside him, securing his back to my chest.
Warmth lured me to sleep, and I was standing in the woods surrounding North Lane, walking along the brook barefoot, a long stick glued to my hand. I was alone, with only the sun kissing my skin and the birds whistling from the treetops.
It was peaceful. Calm. Like the many summers spent venturing through the trees with an imaginary quest to occupy my time.
