***
I stumbled into the kitchen and flicked on the kettle, gaze drifting toward the clock that read 6:45am. Auden's alarm was set for 7am on school days, but he usually showered and brushed his teeth thirty minutes before, slipping into his school uniform by the time the alarm screamed at him to wake up.
Pouring a hot chocolate for the both of us, I let my mind wander, replaying the memory of plunging a blade through Joe's heart.
Not real.
The Devil stood beside me, his eyeless sockets crawling with roaches that threatened to fall into my drink. Tendrils of smoke danced around him, snakes slithering up his legs as his clawed hand reached for my teaspoon. He stirred my drink wordlessly.I didn't realise why until I glanced down at my trembling hands, fingertips dripping with blood.
I told you not to go looking for her,he said,look what has become of you.
"I was already insane!" I snapped, rushing to the sink to wash away the blood stains. "I've seen you my whole life!"
Have you ever asked yourself why?
I fell silent, attention fixed on removing all evidence of blood, whether real or not.
The Devil watched on. There were no taunts. No laughter. It seemed the mirrored room had broken him just as much as it had broken me.
I waited ten minutes before venturing toward Auden’s room, concerned his absence meant he was unwell.
There was no response when I knocked on the door, so I entered without an invitation, frowning at the sight of Auden still asleep in bed, glasses untouched on his bedside table.
"Audie?" His eyelids fluttered open, but he made no move to sit up. "Are you feeling okay?"
He shook his head weakly, cheeks pale and forehead glistening with sweat. Frown deepening, I placed a hand on his forehead and cursed. He was burning up.
"I'll be right back," I promised him before hurrying out of the room to find some medication to fight the fever, snatching a wet towel to cool his forehead.
I remained with him until he showed signs of improvement, taking slow sips of water and small bites of fruit.
"Where were you?" he asked, voice raspy.
“I was…with a friend,” I answered.
“You were gone fordays,” he said. “I thought you left me again.”
His words were a dagger to the heart—tearing through flesh until it embedded itself in my bones. I'd promised him I wouldnever abandon him, and yet I had vanished without a word, leaving him all on his own.
You’re just like your mother.
“I’m sorry, Auden, I’m so sorry.”
"Why? Why did you leave?"
"It's…it's complicated," I breathed out, "but I never intended on leaving you. I was just trying to—"
"Please," Auden cut me off, "just tell me the truth."
Swallowing the lump in my throat, I raised a hand to tangle through his hair, caressing each strand away from his forehead. "I will," I lied, "but you need to get better first, okay?"
He coughed weakly before falling asleep in my arms, every cell in my body at war with each other as I fought between staying with Auden and figuring out what the hell was wrong with me.
***
Browning Bookswas empty when I arrived, with only Edith at the counter flicking through the weekly sale reports. She updated me on what was required for my shift before she left, handing me the keys to lock up.
For the first hour, I patrolled the shelves, using a cloth to wipe down dust whilst adjusting books that were out of place. In that time, I had one customer—an old man looking for World War II non-fiction. He bought two books and thanked me for my help. Once he was gone, I called Auden to check on how he was, and in a weak voice, he told me he was feeling up to eating, so I ordered him some food from my phone and hoped he’d be well enough to answer the door.
