He groans, he knows he’s obviously hard. Knows she knows from the way her knee nudges his cock. Her hand slides down his chest, fingers trailing through the hair downward to his stomach. When she gets to the sheet draped over his waist, she pulls it down and just looks. He feels his cock twitch, it’s standing at attention, the proud bastard. Her hand skims down, fingers running through his pubic hair before gripping the shaft. He moans, it’s not a loud moan, but it escapes without him even realizing.
She starts to jack him off, a slow slide of her hand up and down with a loose grip. Kissing his chest and nudging his balls with her knee. She’s teasing him.
“Chloe.” It’s too much, there are too many emotions at play. He thought it was a one-time thing, that the previous night was all he would have of her. Now she wants to go again, and he doesn’t know if he can. Doesn’t know if he can handle the heartbreak of them having sex a second time and then letting her go. He squeezes his eyes shut. Her pace is still gentle and slow, but he can’t focus. He needs to tell her to stop, that it’s better if they just have that one night together. That he just can’t do this, that it’s too much on his heart.
Tears threaten to spill over. He loves her, loves her so damn much. He wishes things weredifferent, that he was a different man, in a better position in life. That he could give her everything in the world because she deserves it, she deserves the world. He finally reaches down and slows her hand. His eyes are still squeezed tight, and he feels a tear escape.
“Axel? Are you ok? What’s wrong?”
Chloe shifts up on her elbow, hand coming to cup his cheek and wipe away the tear. He kisses her wrist. He wants to tell her, tell her he loves her and wants her to stay. It’s selfish, the overwhelming desire in him to say ‘fuck it’ and tell her how he feels.
“Axel, talk to me? Please.”
He opens his eyes, and she’s right above him, eyes searching his face. He holds the hand of hers that’s against his cheek, kissing the palm, then the fingertips. Just a few more minutes. Just a little bit longer, then he’ll let her go, make her breakfast, and walk her to the door. His eyes are still filled with unshed tears. Her fingertips brush his eyes, collecting the wetness and rubbing it away.
“Are you ok? Did I do something wrong?”
“No,” he croaks out. She didn’t do anything wrong, she couldn’t have. She’s perfect, his perfect mate. The other half of his soul. She could never hurt him on purpose. “You didn’t do anything wrong. It’s just me. It’s a lot. Last night was…it meant a lot to me.”
She smiles softly down at him. Her red hair has fallen forward to frame her face, it tickles his neck. He cups the back of her head, running his fingers through her hair gently. She’s beautiful like this, eyes bright, skin creamy and soft, curves for days. He smiles back at her, leans up, and kisses her mouth.
When he rests his head back on the pillow, she follows him, kissing his lips, cheeks, and nose. Sheplants tiny kisses all over his face, and his smile gets bigger. It’s sweet. She’s kind and caring, full of love. Their mouths meet again, this time it’s deeper. He pulls her to him, turns his head for better access. It’s passionate yet slow. It’s wonderful.
She pulls back, eyes searching his.
“Axel, I love you.”
Chapter Thirty
Chloe
Did she think she was going to tell Axel she loved him before the words popped out of her mouth? No. Does she regret it? Also no.
He lies there, eyes wide, staring at her.
“What?” he asks, voice quiet and raspy.
“I love you. I’m in love with you. You don’t...you don’t have to say it back. It’s ok, I-”
“I love you too. Oh, fuck Chloe, I love you so much.”
He sits up, pulling her with him till she’s across his lap. He kisses her, fast and hard, like he can’t get enough. She tugs on his hair, pressing herself against him as best she can. His hard cock nudges her thigh as she sits astride him.
“Are you sure, Chloe? You don’t have to say it. Don’t feel like you have to say it.”
“I’m sure. I love you, Axel. I thought...I thought I knew what love was, but it’s nothing like what I feel for you. I can’t...I don’t want to lose you.”
“Never, baby. I’m here.”
He slows down the hands roaming her body, closing his eyes again. He looks like he’s in pain, like she made him hurt.
“What’s wrong?”
“You’re leaving. You have to leave, go back to New York.” He slides her off his lap, deposits her on the bed next to him, arm still wrapped around her back, pulling her close to his side.
“I don’t…” She doesn’t want to leave, wants to stay with Axel. Wants to be with him forever. But what does that really mean? What can forever look like when they live across the country from each other?
“It’s ok, baby, don’t cry.”
