‘I just wanted to say,’ I venture as we reach the station, ‘I really am sorry that I lied to you and made you believe I was the real Kate...’
She stops and glances briefly down at the dogs. ‘Kate, listen,’ she starts. ‘I don’t know how to say this. I was quite deranged at the time, still so bereaved and grieving...’ She stops, sweeping a hand over her face. My heart is beating hard. ‘I saw you standing there,’ she continues, ‘looking as if you didn’t know where you were going. You looked lost. And when I heard you shout, “I’m Kate!” on the phone I thought, gosh, is that really her in that funny outfit with no luggage? We’re really going to be spending three weeks together?’ She laughs then.
‘You must’ve been pretty horrified,’ I say, laughing too.
‘You just... weren’t what I expected. But you were wonderful and I realised I should never make judgements like that,’ she continues. ‘And youarethe real Kate. You’ll always be the real Kate to me.’
We stand there for a moment with people milling around us, in and out of the tube station. And then I hug her tightly.
‘Alice, Iwaslost that day,’ I say as we pull apart. ‘And you helped me to find myself again.’
She beams. ‘So what now? I mean, what’s next for you?’
Alice knows my options. I went through them with her over lunch, just as I did with Tash last night.
‘I promise I’ll keep you posted,’ I say.
‘I’m sure you’ll make the right decision.’
I smile at that, filled with warmth and happiness. ‘I’m just making it all up as I go along, Alice. Just like Mum did, when we ran away to London.’
‘That’s what we all do really,’ she says. ‘And I think that’s a perfectly fine way to live our lives.’
‘I do too. And, Alice...’ I pause. ‘You rescued me. Thank you so much.’
‘Nonsense,’ she says, stepping back and looking at me, her eyes wet with tears. ‘I didn’t rescue you, Kate. You rescued yourself.’
CHAPTER FIFTY
Vince
Kate was a better driver than he was really, although Vince always drove when they were out and about together. Not today, though. Today, Kate is at the wheel because Vince’s arm is still in a cast. It’s annoying and painful sometimes but he’s getting better. And actually, being the passenger is okay.
This whole period, with Kate and Edie being home, hasn’t quite turned out as he’d hoped. He’d wanted it to be just like it used to be. And of course that was impossible. Edie is a grown woman now, and Kate has changed, and he probably has too (for the better, he hopes). Yet it’s still been a wonderful, special time, the three of them being together again.
‘I’m going to really miss you two,’ Edie says as Kate turns off for the airport.
‘C’mon, you’re desperate to get us out of your hair.’ Vince grins, glancing back at her from the passenger seat. He’s determined not to be tearful or maudlin as they see her off for her flight.
‘I’m not!’ she says, laughing. ‘How can you say that, Dad?’ He’s about to fire back some retort, but his phone rings, and when he sees the name displayed his heart seems to thump against his ribs.
‘Hi,’ he says, all bright and perky. ‘Yeah, we did thanks. Hope you had a good one too...’ He catches Kate giving him a quick look. ‘Right,’ he goes on. ‘Oh...right. I see. That makes sense. I did wonder, yeah. It’s been quite a while. Yep, I understand that. Well, I’m glad. I’m glad... for him.’ There’s a flurry of pleasantries and he finishes the call and blows out a lungful of air.
‘What was that?’ Kate asks.
His face is flushed and he’s raking back his hair, not knowing what to do with himself, trapped in the passenger seat with his arm encased in plaster. ‘That was Zoe. My editor—’
‘I know who Zoe is, Vince.’ She frowns. ‘So, any news about your book?’
‘They’re, um... pausing it,’ he mutters.
‘What does that mean, Dad?’ Edie asks.
‘I think it means... they’re putting it on hold.’
‘Oh, Dad,’ Edie exclaims.
‘They can’t do that, surely?’ Kate sounds outraged.
