Another small silence. My passive-aggressive tone wasn’t intentional and now I wish I hadn’t brought it up. ‘You want it to be just us,’ I suggest.
He shakes his head now. ‘I know it’s ridiculous. And you’re right. We need to do it …’
I can’t help laughing at that. ‘That sounds ominous, like getting the roof fixed …’
He grins. ‘No, Iwantyou to meet her.’
‘I mean,’ I add, teasing him now, ‘if you think she’d be horrified by me—’
‘Of course she won’t be horrified!’ He pushes back his salt-and-pepper hair and adjusts his glasses. ‘So, what d’you think we should do? Should we all go out to dinner or something?’
‘We could do that.’ I try to picture us all, with Charlie there too; I couldn’t not invite him, I’d want him to be there. But would he want to come? And, if he agreed, how would he feel being forced to sit at a restaurant table with a stranger who’s pretty famous and ‘a fairly strong personality’ as James has put it, I suspect diplomatically?
My stomach swirls with nerves at the thought of it. ‘Maybe we should do something less, um …’
‘Less “the big introduction” scenario?’ he suggests.
I nod. ‘Could Esther come round sometime when I’m at your place?’
‘She could, yes.’
‘That wouldn’t be awkward, would it? Me being there?’
‘I don’t see why it would be,’ he says unconvincingly.
We look at each other and chuckle at how complicated we’re making this. ‘We’re not nervous about this at all, are we?’ I remark as we leave the restaurant.
‘’Course not,’ James agrees with a wry smile. ‘We’recompletelyrelaxed.’ It strikes me again how easy it’s been until now, getting to know each other layer by layer without any complications at all.
‘James?’ I start as he lets us into his house. ‘How about you bring Esther out to my place one time?’
He looks at me. ‘Sure, if you think that’d be best?’
‘What I could do,’ I continue, warming to the idea now, ‘is make a few dishes I’ve been wanting to test for my column, and we’ll have a casual Sunday lunch. I could invite Kim and Lorenzo too, and make it a nice, relaxed thing, rather than an “I’m dragging you out to the country to meetLauren” kind of thing …’
‘That sounds great,’ he says, ‘if you wouldn’t mind doing that?’
‘Of course I wouldn’t mind. It’s what I love doing.’ I pause. ‘D’you think she’d agree to come?’
‘Yeah, definitely.’ He nods. ‘I can’t see any problem with that.’
‘I think it’d be fun, don’t you?’ Now I’m picturing a casual lunch of various tarts and salads, maybe a cake, so everyone can help themselves. I’m visualising the wine flowing and everyone having a lovely time, like normal families do.
‘It’ll be great,’ James says firmly, kissing me in the hallway.
I smile, thrilled but a little scared at the prospect of hosting such an event.Just a casual lunch,I tell myself firmly. ‘Let’s do it then,’ I say.
‘Okay! So that’s that sorted …’
I look at James, trying not to blurt out the question that’s burning away in my brain, but unable to stop myself. ‘D’you think she’ll like me?’
He gives me anare-you-mad?kind of look. ‘Who, Esther? She’llloveyou,’ he says.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
JAMES
My daughter looks up at me across my kitchen table a few days later. ‘Do Ihaveto come?’
