“What’s wrong? Heather is here until nine and I’ve tightened security. You have my word that you’ll be safe.”
“Don’t go,” Anastasia pleaded.
“I have to.”
“Please, Nikolai, stay with me.”
“You have no idea how hard it is being here without you. To not know where you’re going, who you’re with or if you’re safe...I can’t take this.” She turned away as her voice broke.
I felt like a pile of utter garbage.
It was bad enough not being able to be here with her but to cause her to worry as well. Maybe that had been an oversight on my part, I could’ve been more sensitive to what she herself had to deal with in my absence.
My hand closed on her arm and pulled her back to me. As I caught sight of her face, I sighed. She was in near tears, a look of thorough heartbreak on her face.
“You have no reason to worry, and you have no reason to trust me… but I hope that you do. You also have no idea how much I can’t wait to come home to you tonight.”
I didn’t know if it had more to do with the fact that she didn’t know where I was going or the fact that I was going at all. I stepped closer and wrapped her in my arms. I pressed my lips to her forehead hoping it was just that easy to make all of her worries disappear.
I wished she could’ve known just how much I didn’t want to leave her side.
“It’s a safe gig, and it’ll only be for a few more nights,” I told her with conviction. After this job, I would be talking to my brothers about scaling back on the late nights. I didn’t care what they had to say, I wouldn’t be leaving Anastasia on her own every night. I hadn’t brought her here to only be with her a few hours a day. I wanted a life with her, and I deserved that much.
All my adult life I’d worked late hours, worked all the hours they needed me for. I hadn’t a care about what time I came home, or how much time I spent away from it. I’d gotten used to it, even grown to prefer the night shifts.
These past two months had been a completely different story. I’d quickly come to hate having to leave the house at all, and after the attack the other week, we were all a little bit on edge.
“I promise. I’ll be back before you know it,” I whispered, holding her close. I placed a swift kiss on her lips before letting her go. I turned and walked out the door and climbed into my truck quickly before I could change my mind. To say, fuck it and stay by her side.
I looked back in the rearview mirror to see her still standing by the door, watching me as I drove away.
I arrived to work in a bad mood, no longer caring about any of this shit. I supposed it was lucky that my brother was the one in charge after all. I would’ve been so quick to throw in the towel. If it were up to me we might’ve just lost everything we’d worked so hard for, that our parents had worked so hard for.
All for her, I would’ve given up everything.
* * *
I spotted the red-headed bloke from across the room. When I received the call from the bar staff to escort a man out of the building I’d had a feeling it’d be him. “Roger, I think it’s time for you to head home. You want me to get you a cab?”
“Just one more?” he whined as he downed the contents of his glass.
“I think you’ve had enough.”
“I won’t be any trouble.”
“Come on, Roger.” I helped him stand and led him towards the exit. I liked Roger, he’d been a regular here for years but unfortunately, it wasn’t good business for drunks to be hanging around.
I dialed a cab and waited out front with him until it arrived. Like I said, he was a good guy, I wouldn’t chance anything happening to him. Alone and drunk on these streets, that was as close to asking for trouble as you could get.
“Where’s the missus, tonight Rog?”
He groaned in response and I suddenly understood why he was in such a bad way. “Everything okay with Cindy?”
“She’s out again.”
Ah.
Unease crept over me as I tried to think of what to say to that.
