“Wow. That must be another guy you’re talking to. I’ve only ever dreamed of being that tall.”
Ugh, I hadn’t imagined it. Connor was the only one I had chatted with since my last disaster of a date. Not only had he lied, but he had decided to gaslight me instead of owning up to it.
I heard the telltale buzz of my phone and glanced quickly at it.
Hawk: Never realized men lied about their height so often.
Me: Oh yeah. Stay tuned. Already starting with gaslighting, too.
Me: That’s not the only size they lie about…
“Do you mind?” Connor eyed my cellphone in annoyance.
“Sorry, I don’t stray far from my phone on first dates. I have friends who are checking up on me.” Using my phone was rude, but I’d already decided that he didn’t have the right to call me out on anything.
“Well, now that you know I’m not an axe murderer, can we agree to put the phones away?” His tone was downright nasty, and I bristled in response. Based on that tone, no, I wasn’t doing anything he asked.
“Oh, you’re a long way from proving anything.” That came off cockier than I had planned, but I was growing more annoyed with Connor as the time passed. While I usually wanted my dates to find me attractive, the way he leered at my breasts bordered on creepy and wasn’t at all sexy. I wished I had a sweater with me to cover up.
I ordered a Chardonnay, and Connor ordered a light beer. At least he wasn’t pounding hard liquor. Jesus, what was it that made me want to see the bright side? I knew instantly that there was no chemistry. Why was I sitting through this drink and even bothering to pretend? Shit, had it gotten so bad that all I needed was a man who didn’t get absolutely blitzed on the first date?
And just as I took my first sip of wine, he had to open his mouth. He. Made. It. Worse.
“I think it’s important to get things out in the open right away. I expect a blowjob when I come home from work every day.”
And yes, my wine sprayed all over the front of his polo shirt. I heard Hawk’s snort, and the bartender dropped the glass he was polishing.
“And can you explain exactly how you’re going to find a woman who likes you enough to perform that job?”
“Well, look at me.”
Oh, I did. I wasn’t one to degrade short men; I’d even run across a micropenis or two that still got the job done. But even though Connor had classic good looks, he lacked even a single shred of charm. He was good enough to get my attention, but then he disgusted me with his personality.
“Oh, I am. And not only would I never plan to get my knees dirty for you, I’m done. You can leave.”
With that, I turned my back on him and sipped my wine as I stared into the mirror behind the bar.
Across the bar, Hawk clapped, and the bartender and another server who had overheard what Connor said joined in.
He looked stunned, pushed away his beer, and said, “With this treatment, I’m not paying for the beer.”
Joe, the manager, arrived just in time and led him out the door. “It’s okay,” Joe said. “You seemed the type to split on your tab anyway.”
Hawk and I watched him as Joe led him out the door. He bitched the entire way, but thankfully, Joe wasn’t backing down.
“I thought he seemed better than Tyler.” I shrugged and hung my head.
“Oh, he was better than Tyler. But still a garbage human being,” Hawk said.
I quickly polished off my glass of wine, slid into the seat next to Hawk, and ordered another.
“I hope you don’t mind; I’m going to need at least two glasses of wine to forget about that.”
Hawk sat back on his stool. “Be my guest. I planned to watch out for you with him. I’m good at keeping an eye out, so you can safely tie one on.”
“I hope you don’t think less of me after both debacles.”
“No. But if you’d gone home with him, I would have.”
