I am no stranger to night terrors, but this was so real, so intense. I can’t go on much longer like this. This can’t become my life. Being scared every second of the day, only to close my eyes at night and deal with my nightmares when I should be able to escape this world at least for a short time. I can’t live like this.
Damon might not force himself on me, but he also won’t protect me unless I give him what he wants.
I swing my legs off the bed and creep out into the hallway. It’s dark, dark as midnight. My hands feel along the wall until I find a light switch. My eyes squeeze shut from the brightness that fills the space. My gaze swings up and down the hall. There are four doors, two to the right and two to the left, and out of all of them, there’s only one that’s closed.
I feel anxious even walking across the hall toward it. It must be Damon’s, though I suppose it could be that other man’s?
Holding my breath, I twist the knob, opening the door as quietly as I can. I sneak into the room with treacherous tears upon my cheeks. Crying is a weakness to Damon, I know this, but I can't stop the emotional roller coaster I'm on. I sniffle into my arm and wipe away the tears. Then I glance up and take in every single inch of Damon Rossi.
He’s breathtakingly beautiful—in a dark and tormented way. His nearly black hair is disheveled. His body is relaxed—and damn does he have a body. It looks like it's been chiseled from stone—each muscle and crevice drawing me in. His eyes are closed, his chest rising and falling in an even rhythm.
As I tiptoe toward his bed, I consider turning around and running back the way I came. The fear of what may happen to me without his protection keeps me rooted. I have to talk to him…and try to reason with him. It's the only way I'm going to make it out of this alive. I exhale, letting all the anxiousness out. My eyes drift over Damon's sleeping body one last time, but once I reach his face, I realize he isn't sleeping anymore.
“What the fuck are you doing?” His voice is gruff, and full of sleep.
“I’ll do whatever you want.” My voice comes out cracked and raw sounding. “I’ll give you a blowjob or whatever you want, but I want something in return. I want you to promise you’ll protect me.”
Damon's eyes bore into mine. They’re darker than normal in the dim lighting. I shiver—out of fear or cold, I don't know.
Time stands still between us. Damon doesn't say anything right away. He only looks at me like he’s trying to figure out if I’m really standing at his bedside or not.
I chew on my bottom lip. I’m not really sure what to do now. Is he waiting for me to make the first move?
My nerves are on edge. I’ve never done anything like this before. I’m just over eighteen, and my brother made sure no one ever had a chance to date or kiss me. I’m trying to recall images from a porn I once watched out of curiosity.
I climb onto the bed, grabbing the top of the black comforter. I start pulling the heavy blanket off him, but he snatches my wrist.
“No...no blowjob. I don’t want to force you to do something.”
For a moment, I panic.No?Does that mean he’s retracted his offer? Is he not going to protect me anymore? If he doesn't want this, then what does he want? I’m seconds away from begging him for his help, from offering him anything I can think of.
Even my virginity…The very last thing I own.
He doesn’t give me a chance to plead or beg for his protection. Instead, he does something that seems very unlike the Damon I’ve come to know. Releasing my wrists from his steel-grip, he pulls me on top of him. I can feel his hot breath against my lips, and I wonder if he’s going to kiss me.
And then he does.
His full lips sear mine.
I can’t think. I can’t breathe. Fear trickles up my spine.
I’m kissing Damon. I’m kissing him. Or maybe he’s kissing me.
I go stiff against him. My first thought is to push him away, but then I feel his soft, warm lips deepen against mine. He’s a kisser..and my body starts to become affected by those real kisses, burning me up from the inside out.
An emotion so deep, something I’ve never experienced before, throbs to the surface, spiraling out of control inside me. My body softens into his hold while my lips mold to his. My lips were made to kiss his. He tastes like bourbon, and there's a faint smokiness clinging to his skin. It’s an exotic combination, but I don’t mind. All those things heighten our kiss. My fingers splay across his bare, chiseled chest, as if holding onto him could stop my body from melting into a pile of mush.
I feel him pull away slowly, his lips feather light against mine until he's completely gone. And like a flower misses the sun's warmth at night, I miss Damon's lips against mine. His warmth seeps into me, showing me a side of him I’d been certain didn't exist. My brown eyes bleed into his sleepy, coffee-colored ones. His gaze never wavers from mine, and I watch as something swims in his eyes—an unreadable emotion. Deep down, I know I’ll be okay. I don't know how I know this or why, but I can feel it in Damon’s gaze—like a protective blanket coating my body.
The moment ends, and with little effort, Damon pulls me to his chest. I rest my head against his warm skin. The sound of his heart beating fills my ears, its steady rhythm calming me. As his hands glide down my arms, goosebumps cover my skin.
After today, I was certain I’d never let him touch me again, but now I’m not so sure.
His hold on me tightens, instinctually, as if he wants to make sure I don’t go anywhere. Shock twists deep inside me as he brings his other hand to my head, burying his thick fingers into my brown mane. When he starts playing with the natural curls at the ends of each strand, I nearly moan.
His touch relaxes me, soothes me. I don't want this moment between us to end.
“Don’t be scared. You have no reason to be scared of me.” He licks his lips before smiling at me. “I’m a bastard, a killer, and the worst man to be in your presence, but I’ll do whatever I can to protect you,” he whispers before his hand stills in my hair, cradling my head against his body.
