“Come on, let’s get you cleaned up.” I stand, and thank fuck, she follows my lead. Yet another surge of fury runs through my veins when I see her shirt ripped from the collar down to her breasts. Her bra is peeking out, and if I was wearing a shirt right now, I would probably give it to her.
She walks with me, only her legs seem much more unstable than usual. Her steps remind me of a newborn fawn taking its first steps. I put my arm around her and tug her to my side to make sure she doesn’t fall on the way back home. She seems a bit out of it, doesn’t even stiffen when I pull her close.
Back in the house, I deposit her on the couch before making sure all the doors and windows are locked. I rarely do this, Mojo is the best alarm system there is, but I feel like I should now.
After I’m done with that, I go to the bathroom and turn the shower on. I return to the couch to undress a now lethargic Penny. When she is completely naked, I step out of my shorts and pick her up. Carrying her through the house, I see Mojo looking at me funny, and I shake my head at him.
I step under the shower, still cradling her against my chest longer than necessary. Her cheek presses against my skin, and when the water hits us, she turns her face to bury it in my chest.
After a few minutes, I set her down. “Can you stand?”
She nods so slightly that I almost didn’t catch it. I set her down and wash her hair first. She doesn’t move or say anything, only closes her eyes when I rinse out the shampoo. With a soapy rag, I wash her body, paying special attention to the sensitive part in between her legs. I thought that might drag her out of this trance she is in right now. It doesn’t.
Her eyes are open, but I don’t think she can actually see or feel anything. It’s like she is numb inside and out.
This must be her survival mechanism. When she can’t handle something and life gets too much, she just checks out. Somehow, she can numb herself. I’m no psychotherapist, but I can’t imagine this is good for her. She needs to let it out. Kick the shit out of something or take a bat to a beat-up car. Instead of letting go of her anger and fright, she keeps it locked away somewhere deep inside her mind. I just need to find that key and unlock that part of her, let the old Penny out. And if I can’t find the key, I’ll just have to kick in the door.
When we finish in the shower, I wrap her up in a large towel and carry her to the couch. As soon as I cover her with the blanket, she curls up in a ball and closes her eyes. “I guess you don’t want to eat lunch then?”
No reaction.
I open the fridge and take out a steak we got from the store yesterday. I throw one at Mojo, watching him catch it midair.
“Good boy.” I pat him on the head while he devours the mountain of meat in two large bites. “You deserve that.”
Penny stays curled up on the couch for the rest of the day, only getting up a few times to go to the bathroom. I couldn’t get her to eat anything, but she won’t wither away from skipping a meal, so I let it go.
She freaked out a little when I left to go to the gas station, but I assured her noone is coming back, and she settled down. She still looked relieved when I got back, though, which is an odd concept to think about.
When it’s almost midnight, I finally get into my bed, even though I know I won’t be able to sleep right now. I stare at the ceiling for a while, trying to figure out what to do with that bundle of joy on my couch. This has turned out to be way more work than I had expected. That’s the last time I let my dick make decisions.Yeah, right.
Ten minutes later, when I’m almost asleep, my bedroom door creaks open, and Penny’s silhouette appears in the doorway. The low light coming from the living room highlights every curve of her body, making my dick twitch.
“What?” I bark, not letting her know that I’m actually glad to see her.
She walks up to me, stopping next to my bed. I can’t make out her face with the light coming from behind her, but the tone of her voice tells me she is scared and uncomfortable. Well, at least she is walking and talking.
Timidly, she asks, “Can I sleep with you in your bed?”
A huge grin spreads across my face. “Why?”God, I’m such a prick.
She shifts her weight from one leg to the other nervously. “I… I’m scared.”
“Sounds like a personal problem to me.”
“Please.”
There is something about her begging that has the stupid thing in my chest aching. Something that makes me want to protect her.
“Fine, lie down.”
She crawls into the bed and settles next to me under my blanket. This is too close, too intimate. Before I know what I’m doing, I say, “Of course, I’m going to have to tie you up.”
She gasps. “What? Why?”
“I don’t trust you to sleep next to me. You could stab me in my sleep.” Highly unlikely since she walked in naked with no way to hide a knife. But that’s not the point of this.
“I would never!”