“Excuse me?” he finally sputters. “Not doing what, exactly? Living in my house? Having free run of the place? Or maybe it’s the clothing you’re wearing. Maybe that’s what you don’t want anymore.”
“I never asked for any of this. I’ll happily give it back to you right now if you want.” I stand, unbuttoning my jeans.
“Stop it. You’re being childish.”
“No, I’m not. I’m standing up for myself. There’s a difference.” And now that I’ve gotten started, it feels damn good. I could get used to this. “And I mean what I say. I can’t do this anymore. Last night was too much. I’m going back to my place.”
He looks at me like he can’t believe what I’m saying. “There was nothing in our agreement?—”
“I understand that. But I don’t think it’s exactly fair. I had no idea what Isigned up for, and you know it. How can I walk into a situation knowing my voice doesn’t matter? You could end up killing me for all you know.”
The bastard even has the nerve to scoff. “You were perfectly safe at all times.”
“That’s not how it felt. You have no idea how it felt. But what made it worse was being ignored. Like it didn’t matter. Like I didn’t matter.” I put a hand on my chest, and it’s only when my voice cracks a little that I realize how deeply he affected me. How hurt I am on a level much deeper than anything physical.
There I was, thinking I meant something to him, and then he turned around and did that. Completely disregarded me because he was having too much fun to stop.
“I want to leave. I want to go back to my apartment.”
“Absolutely not.”
“You didn’t tell me I was going to be a prisoner when you brought me here!” I’m practically shouting now, but I don’t care if anybody hears. Let them hear. Let them know how much I don’t want this. “Thank you for what you’ve done for me, really. But for one, I didn’t ask for any of it. And two, this can’t go on forever. I have to get back to my own life, get a job and rebuild everything I’ve lost.”
He doesn’t say anything right away. I don’t know if that’s because he’s trying to control his anger or because I’ve completely blindsided him. I doubt he’s used to people standing up to him, telling him what they want. Denying him.
He’d better get used to it.
When he does speak, there’s a dangerous note in his voice. It’s too flat, too even. “May I remind you of our agreement? The terms of it?”
“The terms didn’t include me staying here under lock and key.”
He inclines his head. “You’re right about that.”
“So I should at least be able to go home. Have a little bit of control over my life, you know?”
“And what about the threat to your life? Has that suddenly ceased to be a concern?”
“I’ll do what I have to. I’ll move someplace else.”
“I’m afraid that will be impossible. You still owe me an encounter, and if you skip town without making good on that, I’m afraid I’ll have to send my men looking for you. Trust me. They’re very good at finding people.”
Him and his fucking encounters. “Fine. If that’s what it comes to, you can have the money back. I haven’t spent any of it. So long as my debt is cleared, we’re even. I don’t owe you anything.”
No, I don’t want to do that. But it’s my last hope. If I don’t owe him anything, he has no claim over me. I was hoping I wouldn’t have to draw that card, but he’s not exactly giving me any choice.
I can see the wheels turning in his head. What’s he thinking? I’m almost afraid to find out. But at least I’m standing my ground. At least I can say that much.
He shakes his head. “I can’t allow that.”
My heart sinks. I can’t say I’m surprised, but I was sort of hoping. “Why not? That would make us even, right?”
“This isn’t a matter of being even, Rowan. It’s a matter of fulfilling your obligation. You have an obligation to me, and you agreed to certain terms. What did I tell you the night we first met?”
“But you bent the rules, didn’t you?” His brows knit together, and I know he knows what I mean. I jump on it, taking advantage. “You can bend the rules when you feel like it. Like you did when you told that guy to stop cutting me. Can’t you bend the rules now? It went too far last night. I can’t let myself go through that again. I’ve already spent too much of my life letting other people push me around and tell me what to do. I’m not going through that again.” I lift my chin a little. “I would think after seeing for yourself what I’ve gone through, you would be able to respect that a little.”
“Do not compare what I did to you to what your limp dick of an ex did. We made you come three times. We made you come so hard you passed out. I took care of you after. Washed and dressed you, tucked you into a bed, and covered you with a three thousand count thread Egyptian cotton sheet. You act like I beat you and threw you into some dungeon.”
I huff, frustrated that he doesn’t understand why I’m upset. “I know you didn’t hurt me like he did, but you hurt me in a different way, and you treat me?—”
