I forced myself to focus on the sensation of the call button in my hand. The smooth plastic under my fingers, the slight give when I started to squeeze it. Something real. Something solid. It was enough to keep me anchored, if only barely.
My mind finally started to clear a little bit, and a new thought slipped past the haze of pain and panic.
God, I wanted to see Eli so badly. To hear his voice, to tell him everything, just to know he was close. But the second that desire formed, guilt slammed into it.
I couldn't call him. I couldn't pull him into this. Marcus had proved he was capable of anything, and if he knew Eli was involved, he wouldn't back off. He'd double down to find new ways to punish me through him.
He already hated how much Eli mattered to me. That was the kind of leverage Marcus lived for. I couldn't put Eli in that kind of danger.
So I stayed silent. Trapped in this bed, in my own head, hanging onto this stupid button like it was the only thing keeping me alive.
The soft click of the door jarred me. My breath caught in my throat as a spike of terror shot through me.
Marcus was back.
My heart raced again, every beat echoing through myaching ribs. I kept my gaze locked on the ceiling, too terrified to turn my head and see him standing there. The machine betrayed me again as the beeping sped up and somehow became louder with every panicked breath.
I heard the quiet rustle of the curtain being moved aside, and I braced myself. My fingers already had the call button half-pressed. I'd hit it the second he got too close –
"You're awake."
I froze. That wasn't Marcus.
It took a second, but I finally worked up the guts to turn my head. My vision blurred with the movement, so I blinked a few times until I could make out who'd just sat on the edge of the bed.
Eli.
Even if I couldn't see his face that well, he was clearly exhausted. His hair was a mess, and I thought I could make out dark circles under his eyes. But his expression softened when he saw me looking at him.
He leaned forward a little bit, careful not to jostle the bed. "How're you feeling?" His voice was quieter than usual. I'd never heard that kind of tone from him before.
I couldn't answer. I was too stunned to process that it was him and not Marcus. All I could do was stare and try to reconcile the reality in front of me. My throat tightened and made it impossible to make any sound come out.
His brows knitted together in concern. "Rowan?"
I wanted to say something, but I couldn't loosen the tightness in my chest. The fear wouldn't let go even though he was right here.
He reached out to brush his fingers over my hand. "Hey. It's just me, Ro. You're safe."
My grip on the button finally gave out, and it slipped free to land with a soft thud on the mattress. My mind couldn't catch up fast enough to register anything until he gentlysqueezed my fingers.
That did it.
I didn't care how much it hurt. I moved before I could think and grabbed his shirt to yank him in. He let out a startled breath as I threw both arms around his neck and clung tighter than I'd ever done in my life. My ribs screamed and my head pounded with the sudden movement, but I didn't loosen my grip. I couldn't let him go.
I couldn't stop the tears, either. They hit without warning, and a harsh, broken sob tore out of me before I could choke it back. My whole body shook with relief.
His arms came up slowly, carefully, as if he was afraid he might hurt me – but I tightened my hold on him. Enough to let him know he didn't have to worry about breaking me. I just needed to feel him.
He got the message. I could tell he was still being careful, but his arms finally wrapped around me and held me close. I felt his heartbeat against mine, steady and solid, and that just made me cry harder. The anxiety finally snapped loose and left me raw and aching.
"Hey... Hey, it's okay," he murmured, his voice low and soothing. "You're alright. Just breathe."
I tried, but the sobs kept ripping through me. My fingers curled tighter into his shirt, and I knew I should loosen my grip. But I couldn't. I couldn't risk letting go and losing him. I hadn't realised how terrified I was until right now. How much I'd been holding in just to survive.
His hand moved gently against my back, his voice a constant, steady whisper. "I'm here, Ro. You're safe. I'm not going anywhere."
Those words shattered something deeper in me and made me break down even more. I couldn't even begin to rein it in at this point, so I did my best to muffle my sobs against his shoulder.
