“That is kind of her.”
“Sabina’s great.” Cristian threads his fingers in mine. I’m not sure if he’s realized he’s done it. Heat warms my palm, and I get a little thrill inside just from holding hands with him. I’m truly pathetic, or maybe just starved for genuine human touch. “I think I’m going to send Elio to stay with her this week.”
“How come? And will I need to go with him?” Separation from Cristian would not be good for me. I’m already terrified of the consequences of ditching my cartel cell. As much as I want to bury my head in the sand, I know I’ll need to go to the diner tonight after we get back to the city and try to reason with Pablo and his goons. I’m not looking forward to a repeat of last week, and I feel sick to my stomach.
“It ties into what I have to tell you. As for needing to go with him, I don’t think it’ll be necessary. My parents are going to take him.”
Relief powers through me. A week alone with Cristian is perfect. “What will I do?”
“Perhaps you can plan ahead. Do some meal prep. Organize new artwork projects, and you can take it easy and maybe catch up on some sleep. I’d also like you to talk to Natalia and Sierra, if you agree. Both are family friends. Nat is a doctor and Sierra practices alternative medicine. They might have some suggestions for things you can try to fix your sleep issues.”
I cling tighter to his hand as tears prick the backs of my eyes. Cristian is so thoughtful, so caring. I honestly cannot fathom how some woman has not snapped him up yet. Cristian’s brow puckers as he stares at our conjoined hands. I expect him to pull away, but I’m pleased when he doesn’t. “Sierra already gave Elisa some essential oils for me, but if either of them has suggestions, I’m all ears. I’m sick of feeling so tired all the time.”
“Good,” he says, leading me out from the main garden and across a stone path toward a small forest. “I’ll set that up.”
“What happened yesterday, Cristian?” I ask, staring directly into his face. I want to get this secret out in the open so it’s one less thing for me to fuck up. “Your friends and family have been really nice to me and very welcoming, but there have been lots of cryptic comments, and I’m sensing there is something I don’t know. The way Isotta’s father stopped to acknowledge you and your parents during the walk up the aisle was strange. Then people were taking potshots at us, and I saw you and others run after them with guns. What is going on? What don’t I know?”
Cristian guides me over to a bench positioned just outside the small wooded area. “I’m going to level with you, Sloane, because there is no sugarcoating the truth.” He pulls me down onto the bench and turns so he’s facing me. He takes my hands in his. “Before I explain, you need to understand I am still the same guy, and you don’t need to be afraid of me.”
“I’m not afraid of you, Cristian.”
“You might be when you hear what I have to say.”
I touch his arm. “It’s not going to change how I feel.”
“About that.” His thumb rubs circles over the back of my hand as we talk, and it’s wonderfully soothing.
“Please don’t push me away again. Not after last night.”
“It would be smart to. Us starting something complicates things, but the truth is I can’t fight my feelings for you any longer.”
My heart thumps like crazy, and the goofiest smile spreads over my mouth. “I was so sure you were going to tell me it was a mistake.”
“I thought about it, but I don’t play games, Sloane, and as much as us being together concerns me for Elio, I’m done living in denial. The truth is, I’ve been attracted to you from the moment you walked into my office. I offered someone else the position over you purely to try to avoid this situation.”
“I didn’t know that.” I move in closer, and our knees touch.
“I don’t want our relationship to interfere with your job as Elio’s nanny, but I’m not sure how we separate them. But we have this week to figure it out.”
I lean in and kiss him, and I’m relieved when he kisses me back without hesitation. Cristian pulls me closer and tilts my head so he can deepen the kiss. This time is different than the frenzied kissing from last night. Cristian kisses me slowly, deeply, passionately, and thoroughly, and I get lost in him and the way he makes me feel.
When we break apart, we’re both breathless and smiling.
“You’re so beautiful.” Cristian tucks wayward pieces of my hair behind my ears. “Far too good for me, but I’m too selfish to stop this.”
I circle my arms around his neck. “I don’t want you to stop, Cristian. I want to be with you.”
“I’m too old for you, and you still don’t know everything about me.”
“Like I already said, I’m older than my years, and your age doesn’t bother me.” I run my fingers through the ends of his dark hair.
“It should,” he murmurs, closing his eyes as I toy with his hair. “Damn, that feels so good.”
“You take care of everyone, but no one takes care of you,” I softly say, pressing my brow to his. “I want to take care of you. Being with you like this feels so natural to me. I can’t imagine being with anyone else.” I speak no lie, even if he’s not aware of the full truth about me either. But my feelings for him are real. I’m not doing this because Ihaveto—I’m doing this because Iwantto. Right now, I want to feel everything he’s making me feel, and I’m ignoring everything else. I can feel guilty later. For now, I’m soaking up the excited buzz thrumming throughout my body and equally giddy as the butterflies swooping through my chest.
“I don’t want to be with anyone but you,” he says, scooping me up and placing me on his lap. My arms wind tighter around his neck as we meet in another toe-curling kiss. We kiss for ages, and I’m floating on a cloud. Every nerve ending in my body is wired, and delicious knots coil low in my belly as my core tightens and spasms with every breathless kiss.
When we finally break apart, we’re both panting and flushed and grinning like fools. Cristian nuzzles into my neck. “You make me feel young again.” His arms tighten around me. “I haven’t felt like this about anyone before, Sloane, and that scares me.”
