Either way, the message is clear.
He has moved out and left me no way to contact him.
It really is over between us.
He is gone, and he doesn’t want me to find him.
ChapterEighty
Stevie
The rest of the summer passes in a blur. I’m barely functioning, and I count it a win if I can get up in the morning. I wish I could speak with Ramona daily because she helps to keep me somewhat sane. But I won’t be attending any more therapy sessions for a while. At least, not until I get a new job.
With nothing better to do, I drive over to Medina to see Garrick. I don’t usually drop by in the mornings, so he’s not expecting me. The unfamiliar sound of Garrick’s laughter filters into the hallway when I arrive, and I frown. I haven’t heard him laugh like that since before the accident. His door is partway open when I reach it, and I peek through the gap, watching him and Helena cracking up laughing.
“What’s so funny?” I ask as I step into the room.
“Lena was just telling me about this guy she went on a date with last weekend, and it’s too fucking funny.” Garrick cracks up again, his face awash with pure joy.
“If I wasn’t rushing to my next appointment, I’d give you the uncensored version.” She winks at me as she hefts a large backpack onto her shoulder. “Trust me when I say never go out on a date with any guy named Boris Yatizi. If you see him on a dating app swipe past real quick!”
“Stevie doesn’t need to worry about dating apps,” Garrick says, instantly losing his good humor. “The only dates she’ll be going on are with me.”
I force a strained smile. It’s been months of this bullshit, and I’m at the end of my tether. “Garrick, don’t start this crap again. I’m really not in the mood today.”
“I’ve got to go,” Helena says, clearly detecting the tension between us. She strides speedily toward the door. “Keep up the exercises, Rick!” she calls out over her shoulder. “Take care, Stevie,” she adds, waving at me before she disappears.
“Rick and Lena?” I say, quirking a brow. “You two seem cozy.”
“Jealous?” He grins, wheeling toward me.
“Of course not. You should date Helena. She’s awesome.”
“I don’t want to fucking date Helena,” he snaps. “You know I only want you. How long are you going to keep up this friends charade?”
“For fuck’s sake, Garrick.” I throw my hands in the air. “How many times do I have to tell you it’s not a charade?”
“You’re so grumpy these days, Stevie. You really need to lighten up. Or get laid.” He drills me with a look, and his lips curve at the corners. “I could help with that.” He grabs his dick through his jeans. “I’ve been talking to Dr. Mann about sex, and it’s encouraging. There’s no reason why I can’t get an erection with the right stimulation, and while I can’t control my cock to direct it inside you, you can ride me.” His eyes darken with lust. “Maybe that’s what we need to get things back on track.”
I’m sure my mouth is trailing the ground. He cannot seriously be suggesting this? Has nothing I’ve said these past months sunk in at all?
“Or we can just be friends with benefits for now.” He starts unzipping his jeans as he blatantly stares at my chest. “I bet if I just imagine sucking your tits I’ll get hard. Or I can replay one of our memories in my mind. We were so hot together. Remember that time—”
“Stop, Garrick. Please.”
“Why? You’re single. I’m single, and I really want to have sex, Stevie. You’re miserable as fuck, and you know this will cheer you up.”
I work hard to be sensitive. “Garrick, having sex again has got to be a big deal for you. You should wait for the right woman.”
“You are the right woman!” he yells. He wheels toward me, and I jump back before he tramples my toes. “Don’t try and sugarcoat this when we both know what it is.”
“Friends with benefits would be a bad idea, Garrick.” And there’s no way I would ever entertain the idea. I’m in love with Beck. The thought of being with any other man makes me ill. The only man I want is Beck. “I’m thinking of you,” I say, which isn’t a lie. It’s just not the full truth.
“You’re such a hypocrite! You don’t want to fuck the cripple! At least be fucking honest about it!”
“No, Garrick. No.” I bend down so I’m looking directly into his angry hurt face. “That is not it at all. You’re still a beautiful, sexy, desirable man, Garrick. Any woman would be lucky to be with you.”
“Not any woman,” he snaps, but it lacks bite.
