“I had it checked, and unfortunately, it is. It’s the way the trust fund has always been written in our family. As a trustee, he can alter the terms however he pleases. My uncle is also a trustee, but he won’t do anything. Declan is weak, and I suspect Dad is blackmailing him so he never challenges my father on anything. He’ll just sign off on any alteration Dad makes.”
The usual torment charges through me. “I wish I had enough to support all three of us, so we could break free of him, but the truth is, my sisters are used to a certain lifestyle, and there’s no way I could fund it for long. Plus, Sarah wants to work for Colbert Aerospace. It’s always been her dream. She’s the rightful next heir and CEO. If Dad cuts her off, he will cut her out of the business too. I know my sister. She’ll do anything to get back in his good graces, even marrying someone he picks for her. I cannot let that happen. She’d be miserable. Esther too. She’s a sensitive soul, and I fear the brute he’d pick for her husband to toughen her up.” I sigh heavily.
“So, I’m stuck between a rock and a hard place. I have to stay at least until the girls get the first part of their trust fund.” Even then, I don’t know if I could walk away. Esther would be fine to take that money and make a life for herself, but Sarah would be devastated if she didn’t get to join Colbert Aerospace. I don’t know what the solution is to that part of my dilemma, but I’ll face one obstacle at a time.
“Which is when?” Stevie asks.
“Two years for Sarah and four for Esther. And that’s if he doesn’t change the terms again.”
“Because of Brielle.” Stevie’s smart assessment hits the nail on the head.
“What do your sisters think about this?”
I rub the back of my neck. “They don’t know. I haven’t told them. I don’t want them to worry.”
“Oh, Beck.” She takes my hand. “You’ve been carrying this secret all these years?”
“Yep. Law and Tate know, but that’s it.”
“You need to tell them. If you were my brother and our father was using me to blackmail you, I would want to know. Unless you’re saying Sarah and Esther would be different?”
“They would want to know,” I quietly admit. “But I don’t want them to feel guilty or have them decide to call his bluff.”
“I think it’s a decision you can only make together. Tell them, Beck. You should not shoulder that responsibility alone.”
ChapterFifty
Stevie
Saturday night dinner at Beck’s becomes the norm in the following weeks as the one-year anniversary creeps closer. It’s only thirteen days away now, and I’m dreading it. We are all still on edge, waiting for Ivy to make her move. The longer it goes on with no action on her part, the more wary I become. Ellen hasn’t made any effort to contact me to offer an apology, which disappoints me, but honestly isn’t that surprising. I hope she knows what she’s gotten herself into with Will. He’s not the good guy he presents himself to be, and I fear she has bitten off more than she can chew.
But that’s her problem to handle.
As far as I’m concerned, she’s dead to me now.
It saddens me, but I won’t be mistreated by someone I called a friend in such a cruel manner. Ellen has made her lonely bed. Now she can languish in it.
Hanging out with Beck is my salvation.
I’m having great fun helping him brainstorm and plot his next novel. I suspect I might be driving him a little bit insane asking a million and one questions about his previous books. I have been rereading them as promised, and I’m annotating the shit out of them and keeping a separate notebook of questions. I find the whole process riveting, and though he might grumble and complain when I start peppering him with questions, I think he secretly loves it. I also butter him up with baked goods, which helps.
We take turns cooking on Saturdays, and I always leave with a goodie bag or two. I think Beck is on a mission to fatten me up. He has started bringing Tupperware containers with curries, soups, stews, stir-fries, and pasta dishes to our garden meetings, claiming he always cooks too much. His food is divine, so I don’t complain. He should open his own restaurant or a bookstore-slash-restaurant. He joked we could add flowers and make it a combined business, and we laughed a lot that night, making plans for our fictional business.
When God was dishing out talents, I think he broke the mold with Beck. How can one guy be good at so many things? And be a stellar human too? He’s also not bad to look at. Really, it should be outlawed.
I would invite Beck over to our place, but Hadley is seeing a new guy, Mike, and I want to give her privacy. That and listening to the sounds of my bestie getting nailed is too much for me to handle.
I miss sex with Garrick. He was so good at it.
I miss sex.
Period.
My fingers and my little battery-operated friend can only do so much.
It’s also the intimacy I miss. That powerful connection you feel when someone knows you inside and out. That feeling you get when you’re tangled between the sheets, all sweaty limbs, exploring fingers, and beating hearts with him buried deep inside you, sliding slowly in and out, stroking every heated inch of your body, prolonging the pleasure, and staring so intensely at you it’s like he’s looking straight into your soul as he makes love to you.
I miss that.
