“I have prostate cancer,” he says without attempting to sugarcoat it. “An aggressive kind. I ignored the warning signs, and now it’s too late. It’s spread to other organs. I don’t know how much time I have left, but I needed to make things right with you before I go.” His gaze dances between us as I stand frozen to the spot, shell-shocked at that revelation. “You look good, son.”
“Don’t call me that!” Jared snaps before snorting out a rough laugh. “Fucking typical. You ruin her life, and only impending death prompts you to make it right.” His jaw locks, and fire blazes in his eyes. “You’re lucky you’re half dead, old man, because I want to throttle you with my bare hands for the part you played in splitting us up and the things you did to Sydney andmy baby.”
“I don’t blame you,” he says without hesitation. “If I were in your shoes and it was the woman I loved, I would feel the same way.”
“If that’s supposed to make me feel better, it doesn’t. You won’t ever receive any forgiveness from me. The only reason I’m not putting a bullet in your skull is because Sydney doesn’t want me to end up in a cell for your worthless hide.”
“Fair enough, Jared. I can’t argue with that.”
He’s being far too reasonable. That’s not the man I know or knew. It’s obvious his diagnosis has changed him. I still can’t process the news or decide how I feel about it. I’m not close with either of my brothers, but I would have expected Tucker or Felix to have mentioned it. “Were you even planning on telling me or just letting me find out via the media when you were dead?”
“I was always planning to tell you, and I wanted to try to make it up to you before it’s too late.”
“Let’s sit.” Sawyer gestures toward a hard-looking burgundy leather couch.
Jared folds his arm around my shoulders as we sit on the couch while Dad reclaims the tub chair, Xavier perches on the arm of the couch, and Sawyer sits in another tub chair across from Herman.
Tension trickles into the air.
“This is your show,” Sawyer says, eyeballing Herman. “I suggest you don’t waste any more time.”
Herman nods, taking a sip from a glass of water before clearing his throat. His eyes plead for understanding I don’t possess. “I made so many mistakes with you, Sydney. I know that. But I was trying to protect you. Everything I did, I did out of love.”
It would be easy to throw shit at him to disprove his words, but I didn’t come here to argue. We came to get answers, and debating the motive behind his actions is pointless. He will never convince me he did those things for my own good or my protection. I will never believe it.
“We’ll have to agree to disagree,” I say, and I’m aware how cold I sound. “Just tell me what I need to know so we can leave.”
Hurt flickers in his eyes, but he disguises it fast. “I loved your mother from the second I met her,” he begins explaining. “It was most definitely love at first sight. At least it was for me.” Sadness drenches his features as he looks off into space. “It was actually Amos and Gladys who introduced us. Amos had been seeing Gladys for a few weeks, and they set up a double date with Michelle and me.” His eyes dart to Jared. “It was your father’s first time meeting Michelle too, and I wasn’t the only smitten one.”
“That’s a lie,” Jared grits out.
Herman shrugs. “Maybe. Maybe not. I never confronted him about it, but I could see the way he looked at her. Michelle only seemed to have eyes for me, but I have since questioned whether I was blind. Whether anything went on between them in college.”
“I don’t understand what Amos and Mom have to do with how you treated me.” I’m already growing impatient. I lean into Jared’s shoulder as I stare at my father, willing him to hurry up and tell us what we need to know.
“Amos and Michelle are the crux of everything that happened,” Xavier says, sympathy splaying across his face. “This is important.”
I nod at my father, and he continues. “You know the rest. Amos married Gladys, and I married Michelle. Then Heather and your brothers came along. We were all the best of friends. Amos and I were busy building our respective businesses and not at home a lot. The girls were close, spending every day together and doing things with the kids. I know you think you were a mistake, but you were very much planned.” His eyes move to Jared. “As you were. The girls were broody and wanted more babies. You two were conceived close together.”
“Oh my God.” Panic races through my veins as a hideous thought lands in my mind.
“No, sweet pea.” Dad sits forward in his chair. “You and Jared are not related. You are mine and Michelle’s, and Jared is Gladys and Amos’s son. I verified that when the truth of the affair was revealed because I was worried for a while that maybe you weren’t mine.”
“Fucking. Hell.” Air whooshes from Jared’s mouth as we share a dazed look. I think he almost had a heart attack too.
“I worshipped the ground my wife walked on, but the second you were born, princess, I was a goner. You stole my heart the minute I held you in my arms. You were the apple of my eye, and I was determined to be there for you in a way I hadn’t been there for your brothers. My business was more established, and I didn’t have to be at the office as much. You probably don’t remember as you were so young, but we did lots of things together. I left the office at three thirty every day so I could take you to the park. Some days, we walked from the house. Other days, you cycled. We spent an hour at the playground, and then I’d take you for a sneaky ice cream before we’d head back home for dinner.”
He lifts a frail hand to his face, rubbing his smooth jawline. “I only found out later those were the times Amos visited your mother.”
“How long was their affair going on?”
“From what I’ve been able to piece together, almost two years. That prick ended things when she got breast cancer.”
Jared tenses beside me but says nothing. It’s not like either of us can pretend that wasn’t callous.
“How did you find out? Gladys said you found some hidden letters and photos years later.”
He purses his lips, and a murderous glint appears in his eyes.
