“I’ll be ready to return to work,” I lie. I don’t doubt Rhett will have him locked up in the dungeon at HQ by then, and we’ll be in charge. He can’t force me to do jack shit anymore.
“Good girl,” he says before hanging up.
“What a fucking prick.” Ares pulls his knees into his chest as he settles at the other end of the couch. “What did he mean by responsibilities?”
“He had me and Julia attending parties so we could spy on the weak and the lazy. I had to send a monthly report of people they should be watching.”
“That’s seriously fucked-up shit.”
“I know, and it’s not the worst of it. They are developing some virus they plan to infect people with.” I get mad every time I think about Julia using Chad as a guinea pig and how Mom agreed with the plan. He could have died!
“What the fuck?” Ares’s eyes pop wide. “These people are insane.”
“They think they have a God-given right to do whatever the fuck they want. It’s so wrong, and we have to stop it.” I’m not sure how we can completely transform the organization, but we’re determined to do it. “All of the heirs are on board with change, so it’s possible even if it’s a massive endeavor. We must convince millions of Luminaries and masters around the world there is a better way. It won’t happen overnight. It will be piecemeal change, and we’ll have to suck it up and accept we’ll need to do things we don’t like until we can completely alter it.”
“Or we just completely throw out the rulebook.”
I shake my head. “I wish it were that easy. These people, these traditions, are entrenched. If we try to evoke drastic change, people will rebel. We’ll be killed, and others will be inserted in our place. We need to be super smart about how we do this. Anyway, that’s a conversation for another day. Right now, I want to know where your head is at with all of this. It’s been a lot to take in. I know. I’ve been in your shoes.”
“I’m still processing. The Luminary bullshit is the least of it.” He scrubs his hands down his face. “I can’t believe Mom lied to me. About so many things.”
“I can relate to that too.”
“I have tons of questions, but I can’t ask them yet, Ash. You need to let me process this my way.”
“Promise you’ll come to me with those questions. I might not have all the answers, but Jase will. You, me, and Chad are in the same boat. We’re all playing catch-up.”
“Have you really patched things up with the jock?”
I crawl down the couch and kneel in front of him. Reaching out, I take his hands in mine, admiring his long slim fingers and the ink etched on his skin. “We still need to work through things, but we both want to. Chad has been a big part of my life. You’ve only seen him at his worst. You didn’t see him when he was at his absolute best. Chad was my rock for years when I had no one else. He valued and loved me. He encouraged my hobbies and my ambitions. He made me laugh when I didn’t feel like laughing. He was my first lover. My first everything. He has held me while I’ve cried myself to sleep on more occasions than I can count and cheered me on when I needed to be supported. He’s my family, and I can’t walk away from our past or the future we had planned. He lost his way this past year. His dad’s death hit him hard, and he took on responsibility for his family. He pushed me away when he should have held me close.”
I drag my lip between my teeth. “I haven’t been an angel either.” His amber gaze pins me in place as I move in closer so our legs are touching. I stare straight into his eyes. “I was hiding feelings for you and acting on them when I shouldn’t have.”
ChapterThirty-Three
Ashley
“Imanipulated you, Ash. It says way more about me than it does you,” Ares replies.
“It takes two to tango.” My lips fight a smirk, but it’s no laughing matter. “And I wanted it. I wanted you. I just couldn’t admit it to myself.”
He hauls me back into his lap. This time, I’m sideways with my legs draped over him and the side of the couch. Banding his arms around me, he holds me in a solid embrace. “What do you want now?”
“Nothing has changed, Ares.” I wind my fingers in his hair and tip his face up. “I want you. I want us.”
His eyes dart to my mouth, and his pupils darken with desire. “I don’t know how to do this. I’ve never had a relationship, and I can’t stand the thought of sharing you.”
“So, you’d rather lose me?” The words stab my throat as they exit my lips, but it needs to be asked.
“No, fuck no.” He rests his brow against mine as his arms tighten around me. “I don’t want to lose you. Not before I’ve even had you, but I don’t know how to navigate this.”
“Babe.” I pull my face back from his brow, peering deep into his hazel eyes. He’s an open book to me now. “I think the sharing will help.” He goes to speak, but I shake my head. “Hear me out. I understand you can’t share me in the bedroom.” I try to keep my disappointment from my tone.
It’s not as if I’ve been fantasizing about all three of them filling me at once.
I haven’t been dreaming about that at all.
“Could you try sharing me in a relationship? This way, it’ll ease us into things. If you’re not used to sharing your life with a woman, this will give you your own space, and I’ll still be here when you need me. We keep our sexy times private, and I will never force you to change your mind unless it’s something you come to want.”
