Page 116 of Dirty Crazy Bad


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I return to the house Saturday afternoon, after shopping up a storm with Bree, to discover my uncle waiting in the kitchen for me. It’s really starting to bug me how he and Julia just let themselves in all the time. He might own the house, but it’s my home, and I am entitled to my privacy. God knows I have fuck-all privacy as soon as I step foot outside. I know they have people watching me because I sense eyeballs on me anytime I leave the house. It’s really starting to aggravate me.

“Uncle, to what do I owe this pleasure?” I ask, working hard to keep my tone pleasant. Mom’s “pick your battles” mantra is one I’m trying to live by.

“We need to talk about your family responsibilities. It’s time you started pulling your weight.”

I dump my bags by the door and walk to the coffee pot.

“I’ll have a refill.” He thrusts his mug at me. I’m tempted to crack it over his skull, but I simply smile and do as he asks.

When we are both sitting on stools at the counter with steaming hot mugs of coffee, he begins filling me in. “While at university, siblings and children from Luminary families are expected to excel. You represent our Sloth Luminary on this campus, and your attitude and behavior must reflect the highest levels of respect and responsibility. Maintain high grades, and set the best example for your student peers.”

“Understood and agreed.” That I can do.

“However, Luminary students are also required to attend to tasks, missions, and projects as assigned, and they hold responsibility centered around the sins under their family’s control.”

“They mentioned that at HQ, but it wasn’t elaborated on,” I explain.

“You will learn more in time. For now, you need to understand what that responsibility means in terms of our family and the role you will play.”

“So, what is it you are asking of me?” I inquire, clutching both hands around my mug.

“Luminary family members become the sins and vices they control in order to lure others out.”

Perhaps that explains why Julia is such a lazy bitch.

“Eradicating the weaker elements in our society, those who cannot resist falling prey to sins and vices, is the core work we do. There are various ways to draw these weaklings to the surface, and it differs from family to family.”

“How do Luminary families stop themselves from falling prey to temptation if they are having to succumb to it themselves?”

“That is an intelligent question and one we contemplated for years before reaching a solution which kept us all pure. In order to stop us from becoming corruptible, every two years we undergo a period of virtuosity to curb our baser desires, control our human nature, and ensure we remain Luminary and above reproach.”

Sounds like the biggest load of bologna to me, but I don’t voice that sentiment.

“You will learn more about this during your classes.”

“Okay, so what about now? What do I need to do?”

“We are the only family with one sin under our control because laziness and apathy are the biggest threats to our modern society along with pride, but that is for Salinger to address. Other families have direct vices they control as part of their remit, like drugs, guns, the underworld, sex, and other addictions, but our responsibility speaks to the core of human nature, which is demonstrated in all manner of ways. As the biggest problem to tackle, we focus on characteristic traits and the people themselves.”

He pauses to drink his coffee, watching me as his words sink in.

“Lazy, unambitious, unfocused people will not be tolerated as they will drag society down,” he continues. “Those who are indifferent to duties and obligations. Those who give in to boredom, inertia, apathy. God gave us talents to be used. Not using gifts bestowed on you by our maker is a heinous sin. Younger generations have an entitled attitude that must be eradicated if we are to maintain control of the world. Though we see it in all walks of life, at all levels, which is why it is such a huge undertaking. Picking off individuals is no longer feasible, so our strategies are becoming more focused on groups of people.”

“Like this virus you’re creating.” It takes colossal willpower not to snap at him or pin him with the full extent of my disgust.

“Exactly. It has been necessary, at certain times in our history, to instigate such situations. Only through mass eradication will we remove this blight from our world.”

I am sickened at the casual way he discusses killing innocent people. These luminaries are nothing more than serial killers and psychopaths. The level of control and power they wield is incredibly disturbing because there is literally no one to stop them.

“Your role, like Julia’s to a lesser extent, and other Sloth family members is to identify behaviors in others and compile watch lists. Our teams handle the rest.”

“So, I’m like a spy?”

He bobs his head. “Of sorts.”

This is terrifying. If the unsuspecting public knew this was going on, it would create mass panic and global unrest. These people are playing at being gods and it’s so wrong. What gives them the right to stand in moral judgment over other humans? The original luminaries may have had noble motives and naïve goals, but it’s abundantly clear this current generation does not. They are high on power and greed and feeding the monster, not curbing its appetite.