My stepfather is the one who deserves all my anger. He ruined my mom’s life, and now I’m letting him ruin mine.
I want to make this right.
For Mom and for me.
But I’m terrified that in trying to make it right I may only make it a thousand times worse.
9
Ryder
It’s been one month since I last spoke to Zeta, and it’s feels like a lifetime. To say I’m missing her is a complete fucking understatement. I’ve never known loss quite like this. Every day, I’m tempted to throw caution to the wind. To say the hell with it and beg for her forgiveness. But then I remember her ashen face on the floor, and I’m reminded of why I’m doing this.
Associating with me will only get her hurt. This way, I won’t have the chance to ruin her life, and I can keep both Lopez and Valeria off her back. It hasn’t been easy, and the lies I’ve told have stuck in my throat as I’m saying them, but if it keeps her safe, then I’ll repeat them as often as I need to.
Doesn’t mean I don’t regret it or wish things were different because I do.
“Still can’t believe she’s got the clap,” Lopez mutters, looking forlorn, as he watches Zeta jog around the yard.
“Tell me about it. It sucks,” I agree, keeping the lie alive.
“At least you found out before she gave it to you,” Valeria says, cutting into our conversation. “And if you’re lonely, sugar, I can help take the ache away.” She runs her hand up my chest, and I puke a little in my mouth.
Lopez glowers at her, snatching her hand away from me. “Like hell you will.” He slaps her butt. “This ass is mine.” He grabs her crotch. “This pussy is mine.”
He seems to have forgotten Officer Watson in his little assessment. He made a deal with him last year that is still in play. If Watson leaves the laundry room unlocked and distracts the other guards while Lopez and Valeria are fucking in there, then he gets a ride or a blowjob for his efforts.
Valeria swats Lopez away. “You were the one who said we weren’t exclusive.”
Lopez hauls her into his chest. “That only applies to me. You’re not allowed to fuck around.”
He’s a fucking dog, but I’ve got to hand it to him—he sure knows how to wind her up.
She wriggles against his chest, and steam is practically billowing out of her ears as she tries to break free of his hold. “You fucking asshole. I’m done with this. Done with you.”
“You’ll be done when I say you’re done.” Popping the button on her shorts, he slides his hand into her panties, and thirty seconds later, she’s panting and squirming against him. I look away, not wanting to witness him fingering the fuck out of her in broad daylight.
He’s lucky he has Watson on his side, or he’d never get away with half the shit he pulls. The moans and cries coming out of her mouth sour my stomach, and I wish I could walk away. “And, if I want to fuck other girls, I’ll fuck other girls,” he adds, a couple minutes later, plonking his butt down on the bench beside me as Valeria cries out in a fit of rage.
Her heavy breathing sputters out, and it’s clear he didn’t let her finish as a form of punishment for daring to challenge him. She stands in front of him like a time bomb ready to explode. “I fucking despise you. Go screw the disease-ridden bitch, and see if I care.” She storms off, dragging the other girls with her, as Lopez chuckles.
“If you’re no longer—” Torres doesn’t get to say any more than that.
“No!” Lopez snarls. “V’s off-limits.”
“Ah, come on, man. That’s hardly fair,” Kelly cuts in, like the brainless dimwit he is. “Pussy’s in limited supply around here. If you don’t want to fuck her anymore at least let one of us.”
“Are you totally fucking brain-dead?” Lopez sneers, rising to his feet.
I stand, ready to intervene when some innate sense drags my gaze to the far end of the yard, just in time to watch Valeria kick her leg out as Zeta runs past. Zeta trips over, falling face-first toward the ground. I’m already running before my legs have registered the movement. I watch, aghast, as Zeta faceplants the asphalt with nothing to cushion her fall.
Powell blows her whistle, and I spot her running toward Zeta out of the corner of my eye. I reach her first though. She’s curled onto her side on the ground, whimpering and rocking gently as she cradles her face in her hands. Blood trickles through the gaps in her fingers, causing my heart to stutter.
“Zeta.” I drop to my knees as déjà vu hits me hard. “Let me see.” I place my hand over one of hers, gently unfurling her fingers.
“Get away from me,” she cries.
“Let me through, Ryder,” Powell demands, crouching down beside me.
