He drops my arm when we reach the kitchen, and I stare straight ahead, pretending I don’t see Neo’s hand moving under Mom’s skirt as she leans over the sink, rinsing dishes. I fold my arms around my body and ignore the rancid churning in my gut.
“He’s not so bad once you get to know him,” Theo murmurs as we climb the stairs.
I shake my head in disbelief. “I already know his soul is pitch-black.”
“Things don’t have to be so hostile, Lo. We don’t have to be your enemy.”
I twirl around at the top of the stairs and jab my finger in his chest. “Don’t act so fucking naïve. We’re on opposite sides, and everyone knows this is the way it has to be. Pretending otherwise fools no one.” I head toward my bedroom with his footsteps heavy behind me.
He catches up to me just as I reach my room, spinning me around and slamming my back into the wall. My bag drops to the ground as he presses the length of his body against mine, holding me in place. The familiar feel of him against me raises a host of feelings I’ve worked hard to bury. “You’re still so fucking stubborn and so fucking angry.”
“I’ve good reason, Theo.”
He sighs, cupping my face as he peers deep into my eyes. His hazel eyes are more green than brown today, and a pang of longing for the past jumps up and slaps me out of nowhere. “I know, babe.” He looks at me the way he used to look at me. With comfort, familiarity, adoration, respect, and love, and it fucking slays me inside.
He doesn’t know this, but at one time, Theo was my savior. The reason I got up out of bed every day. The reason I chose to fight and not give up. Until he abandoned me and I lost the last parts of my soul. “Don’t call me that.” Hurt rushes to the surface, and I avert my eyes.
“If I said I’m sorry, and that I’ve regretted my actions every day since, would it help?” he pleads, caressing my cheek with his thumb.
“Not one bit. Your apology is too little and too late,” I say, shoving him off me.
Being around these guys is dangerous for me on so many levels.
“I’m sorry I hurt you, Harlow. I—”
I slam my hand over his mouth. “I don’t want to hear it, Theo.” I harden my heart and plaster a matching emotion on my face. “I. Don’t. Care. And I sure as fuck don’t care about anyone or anything connected to The Sainthood either.”
He shakes his head, pleading with his eyes and his tone. “All that kind of attitude will do is get you killed.”
I shrug. “I’d rather die staying true to myself than live a life that’s a lie.”
“Why haven’t you told them?” he asks quietly.
I shrug again, playing it casual. “That’s not how I roll,” I lie.
“It doesn’t have to be this way. I can bring them around if you just give them what they want.” He steps in closer, gripping both sides of my face in a tight hold. “I don’t want anything bad to happen to you. Please, I’m begging. Just do what Saint says. He’s a good guy, Lo. And if you get him on your side, he can keep you safe.”
I contemplate his words for about point five of a second. “Fuck you, Theo. And take your hands off me unless you’d like to be nursing your balls like Galen.”
He steps back, shaking his head, a muscle ticking in his jaw, as his expression morphs into something familiar. “You’re smarter than this. Engage your fucking brain, Lo.” He jerks his head at the door. “You have three minutes. Get your fucking shit, and let’s go.”
I grab my bag, slam the door shut, and lock it from behind, racing to my closet. I pull the carpet back and lift up the loose wooden panel in the floor, removing the box I keep hidden there. I grab the keys, before securing the box and rushing out to my window.
I climb out and shimmy down the side of the house in a well-practiced maneuver, slipping into the garage on the far side, ducking down low as I scan the layout. Saint’s Land Rover is gone, so he must be waiting in front of the house for us.
Perfect.
I dash to the Gran Turismo, taking a quick moment to run my hand along the sleek, black bodywork before throwing my backpack inside and sliding into the driver’s seat. I haven’t driven this car in ages, and I’m glad Dad’s cars haven’t been transported to the cabin yet. I decide on the spur of the moment to keep this car here as a backup because I doubt this is the last time the assholes will tamper with my SUV. I make a mental note to ask Diesel if it’s possible to get tamper-proof tires before I kickstart the engine, welcoming the familiar feel of the car as I floor it out of the garage.
This car can go from zero to sixty-two miles per hour in mere seconds, and I whizz by Saint’s vehicle as Theo emerges from the front door with a scowl on his face.
I flip them the bird, throwing back my head and laughing as I fly past them, taking the small wins where I can.
_______________
“Maybe Theo isright,” Sariah says, washing her hands in the sink as I touch up my makeup in the mirror. We’re early, thanks to our speedier than usual journey, and the bathroom is empty. “Perhaps, you should play along and act more amicable.”
I slick lip gloss on my lips and thread my fingers through my hair. “They’d smell a rat if I started cooperating all of a sudden.”
