Selena wrenches out from under my arm and races up the stairs without uttering a word.
I turn to rip Kent a new one, but he’s already on his feet, a look of murderous rage on his face. “Get the fuck out, whore,” he slurs, pointing at Casey. “And don’t come back.” He picks up her clothes, thrusting them at her.
“What?” she screeches. “You can’t throw me out for telling the truth.”
“Like fuck he can’t,” I say. “Get the hell out and stay out. You are not welcome here.”
“You heard my brother,” Kent adds. “Get lost.”
“Screw you, asshole. You’re not even that good of a fuck.”
“Savannah. C’mon.” She looks over Kent’s shoulder at her friend.
“Who says I’m leaving?” Savannah says, licking her lips as she pushes to her feet.
“Me,” Kent says. He runs his hands through his hair. “Both of you, get the fuck out.”
“Assholes.” Savannah glowers at both of us, but I couldn’t give two shits.
My foot taps idly off the floor as I wait for them to get dressed. I need to go to Selena, but I want to make sure these bitches are out of here first.
I turn the full extent of my anger on Kent the second the door shuts behind them. “You promised me you wouldn’t do this.”
“We can’t all be fucking perfect,” he slurs, prodding me in the chest. “And I need sex. Fucking deal with it!”
“So, entertain your fuck buddies in your damn bedroom!” I roar. “Have you any idea how much you’ve upset Selena?”
“Fuck you, asshole.” He drops back onto the couch, swiping his beer bottle off the floor, fixing me with a snide look I’ve seen countless times on his face when he’s drunk. “Don’t pin this on me. This is allyou!”
“Tell me what you really think,brother.” My fists clench at my side. I’m not usually the violent one in my family, but right now, I want to ram my fist in my brother’s sneering face.
“You fucked your way around campus knowing that shit might get back to her.” He swigs from his beer. “Not my fault you didn’t come clean.” He shrugs, and I want to punch him again. “This is my place, and I’ll fuckwhoeverI wantwheneverI wantwhereverI want. You don’t get to dictate to me.” He points his beer in my direction, and I’m so mad I could spit. “You should’ve told her you turned into a man-whore after she dumped you. It’s your fault she learned that the hard way.”
“You’re a dick,” I seethe, hating that he’s partly right. “I was going to tell her when the time was right.” I stalk toward the stairs, stopping at the bottom and turning around. “I don’t want to see either of them in here again. And next time, take your whores up to your room!”
I bound up the stairs, two at a time, approaching my bedroom with caution, knowing I need to have this conversation with Selena now, but I’m fearful she’ll have a change of heart about me.
About us.
I take a few minutes to calm down, because bursting in there in a fit of rage won’t help my cause.
She’s in the shower when I enter the room, so I change into pajama pants and sit on top of the comforter with my back to the wall and my knees bent while I wait for her to finish.
Steam billows out of the bathroom when the door finally opens and she appears, dressed in pajama shorts and a thin pajama top. Her hair is damp, pulled into a loose braid.
When her anguished eyes meet mine, I wish I had a time machine so I could rewind the last half an hour. Screw that thought. I wish I could go back two years in time and wipe the whole slate clean. Erase all my mistakes and remove the reason she’s hurting right now.
“I need to explain,” I croak, patting the empty space beside me. “Come sit.”
She pads around the bed, crawling up beside me but careful to leave a big gap between us. It feels prophetic. “I’m sorry about that.”
“It’s not your fault,” she says in a quiet voice, tucking her legs close to her chest. “And you don’t have to explain. We were broken up. You didn’t do anything wrong.”
I twist around so I’m facing her and take her hands, grateful when she doesn’t resist. I need to be looking at her and touching her when I tell her this. “I know all that, but I still should’ve told you. I was going to, I swear, just not yet. We were only finding our way back to one another, and I was terrified my past actions might ruin everything. I don’t want to lose you, Sel. I couldn’t bear it again.” I palm one side of her beautiful face. “I love you. More than I love anyone or anything in this world. Please tell me you know that?”
“I do.” Her fingers curl around mine, and it’s the encouragement I need to go on. To get this out.
“When we broke up, I was devastated, Sel. Heartbroken. Couldn’t eat. Couldn’t sleep. I was a wreck.” I wet my dry lips, wishing I had done things differently. “But then, I got angry. I was mad at you for leading me on. Furious with myself for buying into your lies.” Even though I know now they weren’t lies, I was so confused back then. It was the only logical conclusion.
