“Nothing. I’m okay.” I offer him a weak smile.
“You’re not okay.” His eyes penetrate mine. “But you will be.” Electricity crackles in the air as we stare at one another. His expression is a mix of concern and desire, and it’s doing funny things to my insides. Which is weird. Because after what happened this evening, sex should be the last thing on my mind.
“How did you know where I was?” I ask, needing to understand how much he knows.
His tongue snakes out to wet his lips, and I greedily follow the motion. “Please don’t be mad.”
I narrow my eyes to slits. “That’s not terribly reassuring.”
“I knew there was more to this Wes shit, and I was worried. I convinced Sam to do some digging.” He lowers his voice. “He found the email and the video.”
My stomach roils, and I want the ground to open up and swallow me. I avert my eyes, looking at the floor as I knot my hands in my lap. “I didn’t want anyone to see that.” Shame washes over me. “What must you think of me?” I whisper. “I’m so ashamed.”
“Don’t be.” He gently cups my face. “You take all these hits and keep getting back up. I think you have more inner strength than you know.”
A solitary tear leaks out of the corner of one eye. “I wish I was that person, Adam. But the truth is, I’m weak.”
"Maybe you’ve just reached your breaking point. It happens to everyone at some point when the stress gets too much.”
I nod slowly. “Perhaps you’re right. After he sent that video to me, I just fell apart. I accepted the inevitable and downed an alcohol and Molly cocktail that lasted all week. And then I walked my stupid ass to that hotel, knowing what lay in wait for me.” Except I didn’t think they’d drug me and record me.
“Why do you do it, Em? Why do you resort to drugs? What happened that you have to numb your pain?” His hand drops away from my face.
“Why do you sell them?!” I retort.
He averts his gaze, dragging a hand across his unshaven jaw. “Fair enough.” He blinks, and when he does, his green eyes are penetrating mine. “I told you my sister is sick. My mom lost her job, and we have a shit-ton of medical bills. There’s not a minute that goes by that I don’t want to quit. I hate seeing what drugs do to people.” He bites his lips. “I haven’t sold shit for years, but circumstances forced me down this path again.”
I’m instantly remorseful. I’d just assumed he was in it for the money. But the guy I’ve come to know isn’t that guy.
“I’m sorry.” I sigh. “I should’ve known there was some noble cause behind it.”
A look of disgust crosses his face. “There is nothing noble about selling or taking drugs. And I’m getting out of the game.” He sits up a little straighter, repositioning me so I’m sitting across his lap, with my legs dangling over the side of the couch. “I have a proposal for you.”
I eye him warily.
“I’ll give up dealing drugs if you stop taking them.”
I arch a brow. “Why would I agree to that?”
“Because you’re better than this, Em.” He threads his fingers through my hair. “I know there’s a story behind it, and I promise I won’t go digging. But I want you to share it with me someday.”
A heavy weight presses down on my chest. “I want to tell you,” I truthfully admit. “But I can’t do this now. Not after what’s happened. I just want to try and forget that my life is a shit show, and with every passing day, it descends into even further chaos.”
“Then let me help you.” His eyes are sincere as they pin me in place. “Even the strongest people need support sometimes.”
I trail my fingers across his jawline. “I’d like that, and I like being here with you. You make me feel safe.”
“I will keep you safe, Em, and you can trust me with the truth.”
I brush my lips across his cheek. “I will, but right now, I need something else.”
Fire dances in his eyes, and his gaze flicks to my mouth as I straddle him, my core pulsing as I feel him hardening underneath my ass.
“What do you need?” His voice is deep and heavy with desire.
“I need your hands on me. I need your tender touch to erase the memory of rough hands. I need you to kiss me like I’m the only girl in the world and you’ll die without my kisses.”
A rare smile graces his gorgeous mouth, lighting up his whole face. “That’s not far from the truth.” He runs his thumb along my lower lip, and a rush of tingles races through me. His smile fades. “But are you sure that’s what you need. I don’t want you to feel like I’m taking advantage of you.”
