“I got together with Akiko. She’s lovely.”
“Oh. Well, that’s nice. Yeah, she’s amazing. The best mom we could ask for.”
I nod. “She told me a lot of things.” I hesitate, but my gut saysthis is the opportunity.If I let it go, I may never get another chance. “Like about the roses outside. That they’re called Fionas.”
Bryce stops for a second, then resumes chugging down the soda. “Yeah.”
“Why did you choose those, knowing their name?” I ask softly.
He opens and closes his mouth a few times as though searching for an acceptable explanation. Finally, he wipes his hands with a napkin,then grabs a bottle of whiskey from his liquor cabinet and pours a glass. “Remember how I told you Mom tried to kidnap me and my brothers—and succeeded with Ares?”
I nod, leaning forward a little and hoping the story isn’t going to be too dark and harrowing.
He knocks back the glass, pours another, then drains it too. Air shudders out of him, and he rubs his face. “Grandma and Dad were worried, so they hired a therapist to help us. When the first one didn’t seem to work, they hired more. They went through several prominent doctors to heal us. I had Gardy to help me cope, but early on, she wasn’t enough. That’s when Dr. Wellington—my last therapist—told me I should try to find at least one beautiful thing in my life every day. It could be anything, but it had to be beautiful enough to make me stop and notice.
“Well, I gradually got better, mentally, and quit spending so much of my time trying to look for beautiful things. But the habit must’ve stuck, because sometimes I just stop in the middle of whatever I’m doing and have to appreciate it if I see something especially lovely.
“When I was younger, I was sometimes invited to Ted Lasker’s place. You know, the movie producer? He and Aunt Jeremiah had a thing once, and they have a son together, which is why she still admits he exists. Anyway, he has this unbelievably gaudy house with even more ridiculously gaudy gardens where he likes to throw extravagant parties. At one of those, I was stuffing myself with pastries, trying to pretend I wasn’t upset about the fact that my grandfather didn’t think I was important enough to deserve justice. It was right after I’d learned the truth about what happened to Mom after the clusterfuck of the kidnapping.”
My heart breaks for the young Bryce. I wish I could go back in time and hug him and tell him things were going to be okay. That the pain would pass, he’d heal and become the amazing man I’m blessed to know.
“As I was gorging myself and trying not to seethe with anger, I saw some bright red roses I’d never noticed before. They were so pretty and cheerful that my fury and resentment disappeared, and all I could thinkabout was how nice the flowers were. I asked Ted’s assistant what variety they were. And he said, ‘Fiona.’”
My breath catches.
“Then, years later at Harvard, when the vet called and said that Gardy had been seriously hurt in a hit-and-run accident, I was devastated. And at his office, he told me you’d saved Gardy, I just couldn’t look away from you. You made me feel the same emotions as the roses. It was like time stopped, the world quieted down…and I was okay again.”
I press my knuckles against my teeth, feeling a sharp pang in my heart.
“You said your name was Finn, and it just didn’t suit you at all. But then you said that was what everyonecalledyou. And when your real name turned out to be Fiona, it felt a little bit like fate.” He lets out a self-deprecating chuckle. “I know it sounds dumb, but back then…that was honestly what went through my mind. You’re like a little rose that careless people might miss, but once somebody notices, they can’t look away. The rose that comforted an angry, devastated teenage boy.”
“Not dumb,” I manage hoarsely. My eyes burn with tears, my heart aching with guilt and love.
I never understood his pain, the reason he fell for me. I thought it was just gratitude at first, then chemistry—because God knows every time we saw each other, the air sizzled. I knew there must’ve been some affection, but I never knew he put me on the same pedestal as the roses that gave him comfort when he needed it the most.
I should’ve told him I couldn’t be honest about Jude’s blackmail because I loved him desperately and wanted him to love me back. Now I’ll never know if Bryce would’ve loved me if I’d told him everything honestly. Would a rose trod on by another man be just as beautiful in his eyes as the day before, when it was still blooming flawlessly?
The wall around my heart crumbles. I’ve been fighting a losing war all this time.
My hands grip the lapels of his jacket. His eyes go wide as I crush my mouth against his.
Chapter Thirty-Five
Bryce
My heart stops. Every cell in my body freezes.
Am I dreaming?I’ve been obsessing about her lips for so long. I’ve fantasized about her taste, and it killed me to lie next to her in bed these last few days, my entire being consumed, burning to kiss her. The need was so great, I’d have traded my soul for it.
She made it clear she would only kiss me if she liked me, but that it would never happen. As much as I pushed her to change her mind, she’s impossible to budge once she makes a decision. But if she weren’t stubborn, she wouldn’t be the girl I fell for at first sight. Or the woman I can’t quit thinking about.
Now that the kiss is happening…
My mind disintegrates with her lips on mine. She licks the seam of my mouth, as though seeking permission to enter. I swear my heartbeat skyrockets to two hundred beats a minute. My blood is so hot that it feels like I’m burning from the inside out, my skin melting, my brain turning to mush. I open my mouth to let her in, savoring her bold aggression.
She tastes like our favorite soda, mixed with honey and a fire that’s all her—that I adore.
My whole body shudders. My cock is so hard ithurts.
