“She’s a freak!”
“Freakishly hot. The best of the bunch. Huxley got theleftovers, Noah! You should thank me.”
Every blood vessel in my head feels like it’s about to burst. “Thankyou? I’m going to murder you!”
Joey raises his hands defensively. “Okay, fine, no need to get so mad. I tried to get a broad range of women, but the normal ones simply aren’t interested in you that way. You saw how Bobbi was when she realized I was trying to set her up with you! So I’m telling you, buddy, it’s you, not me.”
“Wait—are you blamingme?”
“It’s pretty obvious, man. Look, a little advice. Okay? No offense, but if I were you, I wouldn’t be screwing around. I’d be busy making a baby with Rammi. She’s fabulous mother material.” He shrugs. “Don’t like her lips? No problem. Just concentrate on her nipples.”
My brain refuses to process the nuclear garbage out of his mouth.
“But until you give Ted the grandbaby he wants, I’m gonna do what I have to do.” Joey lifts his chin, defiant and proud that nothing’s going to stop him from pleasing my father.
The hot rage dies abruptly, leaving me surprisingly cold and focused, like I always become when I have a target in the crosshairs. I can’t have Joey sending more Rammis when I’m on a mission to prove to Bobbi I love her and convince her to give me another chance.
I step forward, spin Joey around so he’s facing the wall and shove him hard enough against it to rattle his picture frames. He grunts at the impact.
“What are you doing? This is assault!”
“Sue me.” I press the tip of the blade I always carry against his fleshy side.
He flinches. “What’s that?”
“Give you a hint. It’s not Rammi’s nipple.”
He lets out a sound somewhere between whine and whimper. I slowly drag the tip all the way up until it’s resting against the pulsing vein on his neck. His breathing grows rougher and shallower.
“You can’t kill me.” His whisper lacks conviction. “You’re just a…photographer.”
“Don’t be so sure, Joey,” I say into his ear. “You know what I had to do to get some of my best shots? To survive on the veldt for days at a time? To clear out animals that were in the spot I needed to be? Last time it was a Cape cobra. You know what that is?”
“A snake?” he whispers, trying not to move against the knife.
“That’s right. A snake. Anorangeone. Highly poisonous. Reminded me of you, actually. Skinning it was fun.” Joey’s Adam’s apple moves up and down. I add a bit more pressure on the knife, not enough to cut the vein—it’s not the best way to kill someone; too messy and the spraying blood is a bitch to get out of your clothes—but enough to nick the skin.
“Oh God! Please don’t!” There’s the sound of something wet dripping on the floor.
“Did you just piss your pants?” I demand in disgust, hoping none of it splattered on my shoes.
“Please. Please don’t hurt me. I won’t tell anybody you were here.”
Does he honestly think he has anything to bargain with? He can tell everyone what happened. I was very careful to avoid getting caught on security cameras. And my home security system is going to show I’m currently in the living room watching a BBC documentary on marine life while nursing a whiskey.
I spin Joey around and put the point of the blade under his chin. “Don’t send any more women if you want to live. Ever. Got it?”
“But Ted—”
“You gonna risk losing an appendage for my dad?No more women.”
He inhales sharply.
“Joey, I’m serious. Don’t fuck with me. You know what happens with nice guys when they decide to let go.”
He bites his lip. Jesus. He’s a weasel, but I have to give him credit for blind loyalty to my dad. I increase the pressure a little, causing him to go up on his toes. “What’s it gonna be?”
His eyes are the size of dollar coins. Whatever he sees on my face must be pretty convincing because he tries to nod. With the knife under his chin, it comes out as a sort of vertical twitching. “Okay.”
